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Are Cargo Shorts Stolen Valor, or Just Ugly?

Not even the military guys for whom these baggy monstrosities were made use those big, stupid pockets

Nazi Edgelords Ruined Big Chungus

Like so many memes before it, that chubby Bugs Bunny fell victim to alt-right shitposters

The People Who Dream of Being Amputees

People who suffer from BIID — Body Identity Integrity Disorder — go through life believing their arms or legs don’t belong to them. How far will they go to feel ‘complete’?

Big Mouth Billy Bass, Mickey Mouse in Blackface and the Shredded Cheese Wife Guy

Must Read An Oral History of Big Mouth Billy Bass Ayy, Corona The Lonely World of Coronavirus Recovery Does the Microwave Kill Coronavirus? Where’s My…

If You Wear a Mask While Working Out, Will It Build Up Your Lung Capacity?

Why Is Lobster So Freaking Expensive?

Does Your Blood Type Determine Your Risk for a More Severe Coronavirus Infection?

Stan Accounts Are Holding Their Celebrity Faves Accountable

Mickey Mouse Proves You Can’t Erase the Racism of Blackface

The Legend of Horst Schultz, the World’s Most Famous Long-Distance Ejaculator

‘Welcome to Chechnya’ Spotlights an LGBTQ Genocide — And the Brave Activists Trying to Stop It

Actually, the Mesh in Men’s Bathing Suits Is Nice and Good

America’s Massive Backlog of Illegal Fireworks Is Even More Dangerous Than It Sounds

People Missed Bitching About Restaurants More Than Restaurants

An Oral History of Big Mouth Billy Bass

A Look Back at The Onion’s 9/11 Issue, Bugs Bunny the Communist and Butthole Beautification Surgery

Is There a Way to Stay Hydrated Without Needing to Pee Every 10 Minutes?

The Lonely World of Coronavirus Recovery

The Silent Cult of People Who Run Without Music

Does the Microwave Kill Coronavirus?

Pray for the Dudes Growing Out Their Emo Swoops in Quarantine

The Gun-Toting St. Louis Couple Are the New ‘American Gothic’

How the Roman Candle Became the Internet’s Favorite Way to Get Injured

How Did Police Get the Greg Kelley Sexual Assault Case So Wrong?

Bugs Bunny Was a Communist This Whole Time

An Oral History of The Onion’s 9/11 Issue

Do You Need a Pillow, Really?

Does My Breath Smell Worse the Older I Get?

Do I Need to Wash My Dishwasher?

Why Does Running Give Me ‘Shrinkage’?

How to Encourage Your Dog to Drink More Water

The Men Who Fantasize About Their Dream Weddings

The Best (and Worst) Skateboard Video Games, According to Skaters

‘Waterloo’ Brought ABBA to the World, Which Didn’t Know What to Do With Them

Butthole Beautification Surgeries Are Quickly Becoming a Way of Life

How Often Can I Eat Ice Cream?

Will the Products Keeping Us COVID-Free Make Us Sick With Something Else?

Three Hunters on What Elmer Fudd, Wile E. Coyote and the Chicken Hawk Are Doing Wrong

Coronavirus Has Brought Us Hand Stuff Summer

M. Night Shyamalan and the Curse of Being Called ‘The Next Spielberg’

Everything You Need to Know About Buying Produce Online

The Story of O-Man, the Personal Trainer Who Became the Valley’s Secret Orgasm Whisperer

Five Lies You’ve Been Told About Sausage

‘The Matrix’ Fashion Is Perfect for Our Modern Apocalypse

How Long Can You Go Before Breaking the Seal, Scientifically Speaking?

‘Real Housewives’ Star Dorit Kemsley Is TV’s Best Antihero

Gay Shame Is Bringing Pride Back to Its Roots

Fellas, Is It Gay to Wear a Mask?

Stop Calling the Cops on Your Neighbors for Setting Off Fireworks

Purple Asparagus Rubber Bands Are Actually High Fashion

Why Weren’t the Racist Robots in ‘Transformers 2’ Canceled by the End Credits?

He’s Great at Sexting — But in Bed, He Can’t Live Up to the Hype

Is ‘Naruto’ Running Actually a Better Way to Run?

All the Non-Aesthetic Ways to Make Yourself ‘Hotter’

At What Age Can I Stop Worrying About Hair Loss?

The Infamous ‘Ramy’ Disabled Masturbation Scene: An Almost True Story

When People Say ‘Real Americans,’ Who Do You Picture?

The Inside Story of Philly’s Dumpster Pools, as Told by the Dumpster Pool King Himself

How the Clever Boxer Industry Took a Crotch Shot

The Case for Defunding Police Is in Our Affluent White Suburbs

Rewatching ‘Trailer Park Boys’ Gives Me Hope for Tomorrow

The Secret Lives of Police Wives — And the Abuse They Suffer in Silence

Rethinking the Legacy of Cop-Killing Cop Christopher Dorner, the Sexting Legal Defense and What Would Happen If You Ate Like Gaston

How to Make Your Own Simple Syrup the Easy and Delicious Way

Why Do Some People Hoard Condiment Packets? Let’s Ask the Guys Who Do It.

How Clean Do Your Dishes Really Need to Be, Anyway?

Whatever Happened to the Pension?

Women on TikTok Are Giving Dudes the Corona Height Test

Peeling Porn: The Utterly Gratifying Feeling of Watching People Peel Plastic

Rethinking the Legacy of Christopher Dorner, the Cop-Killing Cop

The Best Part of Will Ferrell’s ‘Eurovision’ Is Rachel McAdams

‘Girls Gone Wild’ Commercials Threw a Million Millennials Into Puberty

Cops Are Trying to Strengthen Their Alliance With Karens

When Rapists Use Sexts as a Legal Defense

Stanning Nick Miller from ‘New Girl,’ Why Baby Carrots Are Always Wet and How Very Wrong We Were About Ron Jeremy

This Is How You Know When Your Car’s Brakes Need to Be Replaced

What Would Happen to You if You Ate Gaston’s Diet?

Can You Soundproof Your Bathroom?

Is There Any Difference Between Dog Food and Cat Food?

‘Athlete A’ Reveals a Toxic Culture in USA Gymnastics Far Beyond Larry Nassar

Nick Miller Was Always the One

I Got Duped by Ron Jeremy’s Wokeness Campaign

The Problem With Calling HIV-Negative People ‘Clean’

The Best Time of Year Is When It Gets Dark at 4 P.M.

Why Did the World Forget About ‘My Name Is Earl’?

Reddit’s Shroom Empire Is Built on Uncle Ben’s Rice Packets

We Owe Courtney Stodden an Apology

What Would Defunding the Police Really Look Like? These Artists Have a Vision

Life According to WikiHow, the Rise of the Himbo and Everything Wrong with Jon Stewart’s New Movie

Stop Bagging on People Who Wear Hoodies During Summer

Why Are Baby Carrots Always Wet?

Here’s What Happened When I Spent a Day Doing Everything According to WikiHow

With ‘Disclosure,’ Hollywood Reckons With Its Failed Trans Representation

It’s a Great Time to Be a Himbo

With ‘Irresistible,’ Jon Stewart Is Still Talking at Us

Hell Yeah, Black College Athletes Should Go to HBCUs

How Paris Hilton Revolutionized the Boyfriend Accessory

As the Country Reopens, Friendships Are Tested Over What It Actually Means to Return to Normal

Why Washed-Up Dudes Like Me Can’t Let the Skateboard Go

‘I’ll Be Gone in the Dark’ Is a Touching Eulogy for Michelle McNamara, the Writer Obsessed With Finding the Golden State Killer