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What’s in This?: 5-Hour Energy Shots

This product contains 17 ingredients. 16 of them are basically useless.

Me!-Me!-Me! Men, the Sometimes-Illegal Art of ‘Manufacturing Spend’ and the Disappearance of ‘Hot Cousin Season’

The best of MEL from the Week That Was

The Fraught Negotiation of Determining How Much Time to Spend With Your Family Versus Your Partner’s

Is it simply destined to be one-sided?

How Do I, An Average Guy Who Likes to Fake Being Sick Sometimes, Know Whether I Should Tell My Boss If I Have a Cold or the Flu?

Seriously, unless you want to get fired, you don’t want to confuse these two

Men on the Shopping Sprees That Made Them Feel Better

One-Hit Wonders Who Deserve a Second Chance

The Depressing Phenomenon of Men Who Ask Their Dates No Questions

Movie Sequels Better Than the Original

The Oscar Contender You Should Drag Your Family To This Weekend (And No, It’s Definitely Not ‘Green Book’)

I Told My Girlfriend She’s Fat. How Do I Take It Back?

‘Green Book’ Is the Annoyingly Adorable Puppy of Movies

Hot Cousin Season Is Here — But It’s Nothing Like It Used to Be

My Life as a Man Who Doesn’t Care About Rocky Movies

Ranking Over-the-Counter Stomach Medicines by How Effective They Are

The Credit Card Daredevils Who Risk It All for the Points Game

27 Things I’ve Learned About Thanksgiving From My Degenerate Coworkers

What to Use When You’re Out of Deodorant or Cologne

Why We Should All Be Eating Pineapples and Drinking Rum on Thanksgiving

and

11 Guys on the Holiday Chores They Secretly Love

and

Holiday Weight Gain Is a Myth (But Your Turkey Trot Won’t Do Shit, Either)

Three ER Doctors on the Many, Many Ways Thanksgiving Will Put You in the Hospital

Ranking Turkey Parts by How Healthy They Are

A Gentleman’s Guide to When Your Partner’s Family Hates You

When Turkeys Take Over, the Unofficial Start of Baby-Making Season and How Alt-Comedy was Born

The Night I Got Drunk Enough to Tell My Wife I’m Gay

and

The Thanksgiving Wrestling Special That Time Forgot

The Poor-Person Habits You Can’t Shake When You Become Not-So-Poor

What’s in This?: Reddi-wip

Thanksgiving Is the Official Start of Baby-Making Season

I Lived Where Wild Turkeys Ruled the Town

How to Get Someone to Leave Without Looking Like a Dick

Ranking Pies by How (Un)healthy They Are

The Alt-Comedy Show That Made Patton Oswalt and Bob Odenkirk (Among Others) Better Men

The Novel Teaching Men What It’s like to Be a Woman, Music in 8D and Why Your Plane Ticket Costs So Much

All the Reasons Why Guys Jerk Off With Their Non-Dominant Hand

Drums vs. Flats vs. Boneless Wings: The Ultimate Smackdown

and

How Much Does It Really Cost an Airline to Fly You to Your Destination?

Why So Many Guys Are Obsessed With ‘My Brilliant Friend’

It’s Okay Not to Go Home for the Holidays

Ranking Thanksgiving Side Dishes by How Healthy They Are

In a World of Self-Perpetuating Franchises, ‘Widows’ Does Something Amazing — It Ends

Why Are So Many Dudes Losing Their Shit Over 8D Audio?

Heavy Breathing, Why You Shouldn’t Puff-Puff-Pass on Weed After Dinner and Beating Off at Home for the Holidays

What Can I, an Average Guy Who Thinks He’s Married to the Wrong Person, Do Once I Realize I’m Definitely Married to the Wrong Person?

If You Want to Be More Productive and Comfortable at the Office, Get on Your Knees

Heists With a Female Twist

The Undeniable Pleasure of Smoking Weed After Eating

A Beginner’s Guide to Park Chan-wook, the Best Director You’re Not Talking About

and

An Alternative Program for Problem Drinkers Preaches Moderation — Not Sobriety

and

The Men Who Watch Porn That Reflects Their Actual Sex Lives

Becky Lynch: The ‘Man’ of the WWE’s Women’s Revolution

What It’s Like For Formerly Deaf People to Hear Something for the Very First Time

How to Tell When a Crowdfunding Scam Is Bullshit

Dudes, Don’t Be Sad Victoria’s Secret Is Failing

Three Men Who Left Their Jobs in a Blaze of Glory

Why We Can’t Escape the ‘Debate Me’ Dudes

The ASMR Guys Who Get Off on Customer Service Calls

and

Ranking Popular Brands of Cereal by How (Un)healthy They Are

The Art of Beating Off in Your Childhood Home During the Holidays

A Gentleman’s Guide to Telling Everyone How You Want to Die

Trashfire Daddies, Vaping on the Toilet and People Who Have Given up Sex

Why Am I Suddenly Allergic to Fruit?

Dude-Strology: What Are the Worst Signs to Be in a Love Triangle With?

Why Don’t We Ever Talk About High-Maintenance Men?

Why Vape Bros Love Vaping While Pooping

and

Everyday Men (and Women) Tell Us Why They’ve Decided Not to Have Sex

The Ultimate Food Fight: When You and Your Partner Have Completely Different Diets

A Scientific Investigation of Getting So Sucked Into Your Phone That You Don’t Realize You’re Literally Being Held at Gunpoint

‘Trashfire Daddy’ and Other Names You’ve Been Given in Your Exes’ Phones

The Great Minds Behind ‘Taxicab Confessions,’ Runner’s Face: Fact or Fiction? and A Man Who Pees When He Comes

I Am the Only Man in the World Who Pees When He Comes

Most Entry-Level Jobs Require at Least Three Years of Experience… So How the Hell Does That Work?

What ‘Runner’s Face’ Is Really All About — And Why You Shouldn’t Fear It

and

A Guide to Fucking Over Uncle Sam by Giving Your Money to Charity

The Misunderstood Heroes Dancing With Flames to Save Lives

How Can I Be a Better Flake?

That Viral Beto Sex Tweet Is Actually Not Good Sex Advice

An Oral History of ‘Taxicab Confessions’

Searching for Butterbean, The Last Days of PBR and the Millennial Men Who Don’t Get Nude at the Gym

The Self-Lubricating Condom Is the Crowning Achievement of Over 400 Years of Dick-Sack Science

Bad News, Recently Dumped Guy: Here’s Exactly How a Broken Heart Can Kill You

What’s on Your Razor After You Shave Your Face, Chest, Groin and/or Ass?

Why Don’t Guys Go Naked in the Locker Room Anymore? The Reasons Why Are Surprisingly Complex

and

There’s Another Major Benefit to Paternity Leave We Don’t Often Hear About

A People’s History of the ‘Slav Squat’

How Millennial Hipsters Revitalized — and Likely Destroyed — PBR

How One Low-Budget Thriller Got the World of Camming Right

Butterbean Hasn’t Gone Anywhere. You Just Haven’t Been Looking Hard Enough

Getting the Boot from Dennis Hof’s Memorial, the Hustle-Porn Hustle and Autocunnilingus

‘Asshole’ Is Officially Passé: Let’s Bring Back These Old-Timey Insults Instead

Why Is Everyone Suddenly Saying ‘Y’All’?

What’s the Average Number of Thrusts During the Average Bout of Sex?

Can a Woman Actually Go Down on Herself?

What’s in This?: Milk

‘The Girl in the Spider’s Web’ Is All Beauty and No Bite (Or Anything Else for That Matter)

Scenes from the Parking Lot of Dennis Hof’s Casino Memorial

Rise, Grind and Ruin: The Dangerous Fetishization of ‘Hustle Porn’

Woods Porn, Engagement-Ring Shaming and When Actors Get the ‘Aunt Viv’ Treatment

How Do I, an Average Guy Who Doesn’t Want to Upset Someone I Love, Tell My Loved Ones About the Latest Tragic Event in the News?

I’ve Spent the Last Week Vaping My Vitamins