eyes

What’s a Regular Guy to Do About His Own Butthole Eyes?

Look, this is all very dumb, but when there’s a story about “butthole eyes” in the media cycle, it’s the duty of every noble newshound…

A Opthamologist on the Efficacy of Eyeball Shots

Are you self-destructive? Desperate to show off your bravado? Did you pour vodka into your eyeball? If your answer to all three questions is “yes,”…