Among the more common refrains in mainstream porn is one often uttered by a petite, kneeling starlet, born of this millennium, who’s just witnessed her more mature scene partner dropping trow. “Oh my godddd,” she’ll gasp, perhaps placing her forearm next to the just-unfurled flesh muffler in front of her for context. “I don’t know if that’s going to fit!”
Though porn producers might try to convince viewers they routinely capture foot-long fuckers on film, most porn star penises aren’t nearly that big. Typically, those dicks range between 7 and 9 inches. However, that still means their cocks are clocking in a good 50 percent or so above average. And so, for the consumer who can’t exactly relate to the characters chronicled in mainstream adult films, there’s an alternative: small-penis porn.
Small Dicks in Porn
Perusing these videos, pinky-sized gentlemen explore a place to feel proud of their privates — or welcome kinky humiliation. They also might learn how to better utilize their tool, and please their partners like never before.
“It looks foreign to you when the sex looks so different from the sex you’ve experienced,” writes Chaim, a proud and pseudonymous owner of a small penis, in an email. A 31-year-old stay-at-home dad in Arkansas, Chaim is one half of the TinyBigCouple, with his wife, a therapist, serving as his scene partner. The pair began posting homemade sex tapes on Pornhub a few months ago, after years of watching small-penis porn together. His wife, who asked to be identified as Rivka, is billed in the clips as a BBW MILF with whom Chaim conducts intercourse using his 2.8-inch knob.
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“A small penis has to be used in very different ways,” he explains. “There isn’t any bouncing with the girl on top, otherwise you slip out. Blow jobs look odd in porn to me when only a third of the guy’s penis is all that fits. Hand jobs look different, too. Everything does, actually.”
Chaim says it was Rivka who first suggested they post videos of their lovemaking online. After discovering r/smalldickproblems on Reddit, and observing “men hating their bodies and feeling hopeless” in some comments, he agreed to move forward. Maybe they’ll appreciate a positive demonstration of a small penis with a wife, he thought to himself. Maybe it’ll show them that they aren’t as doomed as they think.
The three clips of TinyBigCouple on Pornhub have garnered more than 10,000 views combined, an unexpected, pleasant surprise for Chaim and Rivka. “It’s exciting and gives me hope that once we produce higher quality videos, more people will see them, and the content will hopefully cause some degree of positive impact,” he says. He adds they’ve fielded “an incredible amount of supportive comments,” though some derogatory notes have invaded their inbox as well.
“Several men ha[ve] messaged me asking to have sex with my wife so that she can feel a ‘real penis,’ or a ‘real man,’” he explains. “They tell me that there’s absolutely no possible way my penis could give her pleasure (oh, it gives her plenty of pleasure). They tell me to look at pics of their penis so that I can see what a ‘real man’ looks like. They tell me I don’t deserve a wife as hot as mine.”
Average Dicks in Porn
Similar backlash has dogged even small-penis porn stars who have been featured in studio productions. “You will find very, very evil and bad, bad comments about me,” says 42-year-old porn actor and producer Andy Stone, who says his penis measures about five inches, only slightly below the 5.16-inch average. His porn career began in 2013, but only because adult film studios were after his girlfriend at the time, and she didn’t want to shoot scenes with anyone but him. Since then, Stone’s primarily appeared in scenes with a few other porn star girlfriends, including his current partner Baby Nicols.
“When I started in porn, all the nightmares and insecurity from my youth came alive again,” he continues. “They tried to humiliate me, but the more I read it, the more I want to keep going. I believe I represent a big percentage of men and I make them feel better.”
Disparaging remarks about Stone’s penis size don’t only show up in porn clip comment sections, though. He’s heard other male actors express frustration that they’re being passed over for scenes in favor of Stone. Some film producers have also chosen not to shoot girlfriends of his because the women have refused to work with a scene partner other than Stone. He says such situations have been a source of tension in past relationships.
But, like Chaim, as a counterpoint to all the negativity surrounding Stone’s pint-sized prick, he says he’s often called a “hero” by fans on the internet. “They say, ‘Andy, thank you because we see your movies and we feel confident about ourselves,’” he tells me.
Why We’re So Fixated on Penis Size
This fixation on dick size — a particularly American problem — seems to be more of a male construct than a female’s. Women are “nowhere near as obsessed” with penis size as men are, says porn star Dan Leal, 50, who performs as Porno Dan. He places adult films at the top of the list of reasons as to why guys are so self-conscious about what they stuff in their trousers each day. Most male porn stars are “genetic freaks,” he says, adding, “When you’re watching something that’s way above and beyond the ordinary all day long, you think it is the ordinary, and it’s far from it.”
Like Stone, Leal doesn’t brand himself as a small-dick porn star, per se, but over the course of his 21-year stint in the industry, he has played up the Ordinary Joe persona — with a dick to match. He says his penis measures about five and a half inches, just above average, and prior to a shoot, female talent often express relief upon being presented with his more modest-sized schvantz. “They look at me and go, ‘This is going to be an easy day,’” he says, laughing.
Leal’s also a self-described “notorious” serial dater of female porn stars, some of whom have expressed great contentment with his penis. “The last thing they want to do when they get home from work is to get banged out by some giant thing that they just got rammed by at work,” he explains.
Big-Dick Problems
As for Stone, he thinks the porn stars who pack the most seem to excessively rest on their laurels. “Big dick guys can become very bad lovers as they rely only [o]n their size,” he says. “As a porn director, I see that all the time — terrible lovers with big dicks, that’s what we usually see in mainstream porn.”
For most consumers, porn is the home of fantasy, with redwood-reminiscent rods front and center. But evidence suggests fandom in the little-dick porn niche may be getting a fluffing. About 18 months ago, Tony Dillinger, founder of the adult film house Dillinger Studios818, rebranded “Get Your Knees Dirty,” a series of films he’d been producing for years, as part of the subgenre. Today, the site informs viewers that, at Get Your Knees Dirty, “small cocks matter.”
Dillinger tells me that the male talent who appears in the “Get Your Knees Dirty” clips, which mostly consist of blow-job scenes, doesn’t want to be identified. Referring to him as “John,” Dillinger says he first met him when he rented space in his studio to film scenes on his own. A friendship and business partnership bloomed, with “John” increasingly gaining access to high-profile female talent, including Kiara Mia, Jynx Maze and Canela Skin. John possesses a penis of about four or five inches, according to Dillinger, and John has harbored self-conscious feelings about it, which, for a time, kept Dillinger from advertising the series as small-penis porn. But eventually, he noticed an abundance of comments on his site supportive of John’s more meager johnson.
Moreover, they once hired a male talent with a dick sized more like that of a typical porn star, and John’s fans virtually revolted. “I got so many messages back, ‘Why the fuck would you put that fucking guy in the scene!?’” Dillinger says. “I told John, ‘Your fans are mad! They wanna see you!’”
John, who on many occasions had female talent refuse to shoot with him over the size of his penis, was shocked. He soon agreed to a site rebranding at Dillinger’s pressing. Dillinger says site membership has grown 38 percent since then, and is climbing every month.
The popularity of a small-penis porn sub-subgenre is also on the rise: small-dick humiliation, where scene partners laugh at and make fun of the size of the male talent’s package. For example, in what apparently is the most-viewed small-dick humiliation porn clip on Pornhub, a gamer girl suggests, quite dubiously, that she could only see the meat in front of her if she first puts on 3-D glasses. (Once erect, the guy’s dick actually appears to be above average at worst, which again points to general misconceptions about normal penis size.)
But that’s just the tiny tip of the iceberg. Like general small-penis porn, small-dick humiliation clips mostly star amateurs, who are told things like “That’s a baby’s cock,” “You can’t make a woman like me happy” and “Little white boy dick does nothing for me,” as one compilation reveals.
“Words like cute, tiny, small, little, petite, in a positive or teasing tone is hot to me,” writes redditor u/PencilDicc, a small-dick humiliation porn fan, who identifies himself as a 27-year-old from North Carolina, in an email. (He also considers his penis as “small,” even though he says it measures five inches.)
Small-Dick Humiliation
Small-dick humiliation porn can become far more extreme, of course, with small dicks getting stomped on, and female scene partners cuckolding a small-dicked guy while engaging with a traditional porn cock.
There’s widespread belief that kinks such as this one may begin developing in childhood. Redditor u/JM1565456, for one, messages that his small-dick humiliation porn appreciation may have “developed from my sexual experiences — girls laughing, being unable to pleasure them, telling their friends.” He’s logged his erect penis at three inches, and says watching oversized porn stars “kind of pisses me off.” “It’s weird, and [I] don’t really get why it turns me on,” he continues about small-dick humiliation porn. “Maybe making lemonade from my small lemon??”
But Christine Falconer, founder of Ties That Bind Counseling, a social work practice where she specializes in clients with alternative lifestyles, is skeptical about childhood events, particularly traumatic ones, and mental health issues cultivating kinks, fetishes and other unique sexual predilections. Studies have shown that members of the kink community experience about the same rate of mental health issues as the general population, or even lower. A kink, Falconer says, “becomes an issue only when it interferes with your ability to get off, and have that sexual satisfaction — to be able to maintain your erection, satisfy your partner, that kind of thing.”
That said, she can see why, for many men with slighter schlongs, small-penis porn is more relatable, if nothing else. Consuming humiliation, in her mind, is perhaps a way for these men to embrace the uncomfortable fact that their penis is below average or relatively small. “They’re trying to develop some acceptance of it, and so they’re experimenting with it to accept that, ‘Hey, I don’t have a six-inch dick, I have a three-inch dick,’” Falconer says.
Redditor u/Miserable_Reward, a 29-year-old trans woman from Georgia, says her introduction to small-dick humiliation porn reminded her of the commentary she heard about her 2.75-inch penis prior to transitioning. “[P]eople equate having a smaller penis to not being a real man, which as a trans woman that was something that also really drew me in,” she writes in a Reddit message, adding that the phenomenon “reinforce[s] the fact that I’m not a man when so many other external sources have frequently tried to say otherwise.”
She says she’s been bullied since transitioning, and believes that may have contributed to her enjoyment of the humiliation porn as well. She’s also had sex with both men and women, and says the few times partners have made “rude” comments about her size, she’s enjoyed it. “My current partner can say small things like, ‘Oh, just like you’ when we hear a small penis joke on TV,” Miserable_Reward writes. “Or she can get pretty mean with her comments like when she says, ‘With a dick this small, you never would have been able to be a man anyways.’”
Falconer says that if someone who watches small-dick humiliation porn already thinks there’s something wrong with them, and inaccurately feels there’s no one who would be sexually satisfied by a below-average penis, the clips could be “devastating,” and exacerbate the self-conscious feelings. But that doesn’t make it an unhealthy kink in and of itself — it just depends on the audience. Plus, she continues, people have to remember what they’re watching is porn, not reality.
Such awareness could help those lesser-endowed, self-conscious men feel a little bit better about how they measure up. For those who still wish for a bigger bulge, they might reconsider if they rejoice over the pluses that come with having a smaller penis. “We can penetrate deeper without giving any pain, and our pubis is always in contact with the clitoris,” Stone points out. “And we get much better blow jobs!”
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Michael Stahl
Michael Stahl is a freelance writer based in New York City. He's covered the arts and culture, sex and relationships, business and tech, history and politics and other topics for Rolling Stone, Vice, Vulture, CityLab, Quartz, Narratively and many more publications. Follow him on Twitter @MichaelRStahl and read more of his work at MichaelStahlWrites.com.
