rankings

Ranking Hot Sauces by How Healthy They Are

This is the most pedantic, and therefore most vital, thing I’ve ever done

Ranking Hangover Breakfasts by How Healthy They Are

Leftover pizza? Sausage McMuffins? Coffee and mimosas? Which will un-fuck me up the fastest?

Ranking Condiments by How Healthy They Are

Mustard? Ketchup? Relish? What’s the best option for lubing up your floppy weiner?

Ranking Hot Dogs by How (Un)Healthy They Are

Veggie Dogs? Turkey Dogs? Kosher Dogs? Which is contaminated with the least amount of scrap metal?