It’s officially Alien Week here at MEL, and if you’re headed off to Area 51 on Friday, bring lots of water, a GPS and plenty of bail money.
But even if you get passed the nice men with the assault weapons, don’t think for one second you’re gonna find any aliens when you get there. Plenty of good, honest people have been searching for UFOs in the last 70 years, and it’s not like you hear about all the spacemen they’ve been finding.
Must Read
“The Alien True Believers Who Were Searching for Answers Long Before It Was Cool to Storm Area 51”
A lot has been made about the “will they, or won’t they?” Storm Area 51 raid planned for Friday, whereby thousands will (theoretically) crash the famed hotbed for aliens to find out once and for all whether the little green men exist. But long before the meme, regular people of the Mutual UFO Network (MUFON) have been searching for extraterrestrials around the site, and “finding” them, too. Just don’t ask them for cell-phone video. READ MORE
Scooby Dooby Doo, You Scare the Shit out of Me
You may think of Scooby-Doo as a light-hearted Saturday morning cartoon, and for good reason: Even though there are horror elements to the series, there’s also humor and a boatload of camp. But fans have been theorizing about the darker sides of the show’s teenage paranormal investigators for half a century.
Pizza Art
Every pizza is a masterpiece in this writer’s opinion; I mean, shit, even bad pizza is pretty tasty. But don’t sleep on the art happening around your pie, specifically on the box, because though most shops get their boxes from the same small number of distributors, the sufficiently “cheesy” graphics printed on top of said boxes are often unique. *Hits bong* so how is it that they all have different art?
Testosterone: We’re Doing It Wrong
There’s no shortage of radio spots and late-night infomercials promising to cure all that ails you as a man with a little bit of T. Testosterone has long been presented by snake-oil salesmen as a quick fix for everything from low energy to erectile dysfunction. But new research suggests it doesn’t have nearly the effect we think it does, and the fact that it’s been so closely associated with male sexuality might be wishful thinking.
Ham Block
Spam has, in the last few decades, experienced a mini-renaissance: What was once a cheap, canned protein with an abnormally long shelf-life for GIs during World War I and II is now widely found on restaurant menus. But what’s actually in that semi-gelatinous block of mystery meat?
Mmm, pork, but with ham. Makes total sense. Fact is, though Spam is delicious when fried, placed on a bed of rice and doused with gravy, it’s got a lot of not-so-good ingredients in it that will definitely have you holding the salt.
This Year’s Oscar for the Best-Dressed Sadboi Goes To…
…Theo, from The Goldfinch! We kid Theo, a boy who lost his mother in an explosion at the Metropolitan Museum of Art and, years later, wears increasingly bespoke outfits like a suit of armor against his grief. But considering he more-or-less perfects his snazzy style as he gets sadder, maybe Theo should’ve explored a different method of self-preservation, like a grief beard?
For the Best Gen Z Gossip, Enter the World of Depop Drama
All Joe Longo wanted was a damn Lorde T-shirt. But after shopping on Depop, a London-based thrifting app full of teens flogging their used wardrobes, what he got instead was a scam and some of the biting Gen Z melodrama the app has become notorious for.
Pooped M’ Pants
Are we doomed to leave skid marks in our undies as we age? Searching for a solution to his evidently loosening ass, Pete Keeley dove deep into the science of “soiling” — a curse as common as it is embarrassing.
Jeff Gross
Jeff Gross is MEL’s senior editor for social media and content marketing. His daily ICYMI column, which chronicles all things meta on the site, is the quickest way to catch up on MEL, and the funniest thing you’ll read all day. Follow him on Twitter.
