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A Cultural History of the Wet T-Shirt Contest, Why Sleeping in the Nude is the Worst and the Horrifying Ingredients in Sunless Tanner

On paper, sleeping in the nude sounds like a great idea: It’s sexy, it’ll keep you cool and nothing feels better that first moment you slide right into fresh, clean sheets. But Cooper Fleishman is right — in practice, it’s just a big ol’ mess.

Hey, if you’ve thought about sleeping in the nude to keep cool these summer months, try leaving one of your legs or your feet outside the covers, instead. You’ll be sleeping like a baby in no time.

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“Dispatches from One of the Last Wet T-Shirt Contests in America”
Back in the day, you need only turn to MTV’s spring break coverage if you were jonesing for a wet T-shirt contest. Now, years beyond its 80s and 90s heyday, this classic softcore competition has, in the #MeToo era, largely been relegated to the mom-and-pop bar circuit.

This week, C. Brian Smith flew to Medford, Oregon — birthplace of the KKK in the Pacific Northwest — to attend one of the few remaining wet T-shirt contests in America, or at least, the only one he could find. It was just as weird and anachronistic as you might expect. READ MORE

More From Our Gigantic Summer Package

Airfare Hijinx

You ever hear the bit about how travel websites like Kayak and Hipmunk closely monitor what fares you’re browsing, and if you don’t buy right away, jack up the prices on those fares the next time you log on? Adam Elder investigated this urban legend and found that, while it’s mostly bunk, you do have good reason to be weary.

Scorching Hot Take: Sleeping Naked? No, Thanks

Cooper Fleishman doesn’t do the whole naked-sleeping thing, no matter how many people extol the virtues of the practice. While some experience a singular luxuriousness and serenity in dozing off with nothing between bare skin and sheets, Fleishman experiences a sticky, genitals-crushing discomfort — which is why he argues that sleeping naked is a travesty of rest itself.

Holy Shit, Spray Tan Sounds Terrifying

Here you are, a responsible adult, distrustful of the sun and its many harmful effects on your skin. You can’t go outdoors this summer looking like an extra from What We Do in the Shadows, but you can’t soak up some rays, either, given the fact that a suntan is like a one way ticket to melanoma-town. So you reach for the spray tanner, flip it over, and read the ingredients:

Wowsa — I’ll give you ten dollars if you can correctly pronounce any of the 18 ingredients after “water.” Looks like we’ve got some solvents (toxic when inhaled), some PEGs (toxic when absorbed through broken skin) and other goodies (also toxic). Maybe the sun isn’t so bad?

Travel Mode

While a number of studies have found that couples who travel together are happier and have better sex, it’s also true that taking a vacation together can reveal the parts of yourself and your relationship that, well, kind of suck. These revelations often come from friction between each person’s “travel style,” or the specific preferences they have for getting around and enjoying themselves on a trip. In many cases, this friction is merely a blip; in others, it reveals not just a fleeting disagreement, but a glaring mismatch in values and personality that can call into question the point of the relationship as a whole.

Pet Patrol

Pets are like family, but unfortunately, family we can’t take with us when we go on vacation. This makes hiring a trustworthy pet sitter incredibly important. So how do you find someone who instills confidence that your pet will be both alive, and ideally, happy, by the time you get home? We asked a professional sitter and a number of pet owners what to look for.

No One Wants to Be Hungover on Vacation

Right?!?! I mean, everyone wants a drink or seven when they’re lounging by the pool or on the beach, but the idea that you could be down for the count nursing your liver the next day might make you think twice about ordering that upteenth mai tai. Thankfully, we found some travel experts to help explain how to eat, drink and even breathe better to make sure you can spend your trip as drunk as possible.

It Takes the Lotion Off Its Skin

One annoying aspect of many types of sunscreen (especially the waterproof variety) is that it’s so thoroughly difficult to remove. Like, that shit’s really on there. You can try to shower it off, but when you towel off, you often still end up feeling greasy and smelling like coconut. So what’s the best way to de-lotion yourself? Here’s what an esthetician — who also happens to be a former swimmer — suggests.

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