What a week! So much good stuff to choose from.
Do you like interviews? You could do worse than our conversation with Hoop Dreams filmmaker Steve James on his new 10-part docuseries for Starz, America to Me, or our interview with Mets play-by-play man Josh Lewin about mental health and sports, including his own struggles with anxiety and depression. And while it might not have smelled great, our discussion with farting internet sensation “Paul Flart” is still a delightfully funny, surprisingly touching read.
If profiles are more your speed, we covered the drug-fueled life and tragic end of pro wrestler Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart, whose body gave out just as he got clean. Or you could read Zaron Burnett’s piece on Dave Dave, the boy who overcame being burned alive by his father to become a renowned conceptual artist.
Our oral history of the legendary N64 game Goldeneye 007 was neither a full-on interview nor a profile—it was, um, an oral history. In any case, it was definitely news-breaking. In particular, the fact that playing as Oddjob is cheating, as confirmed by the game’s developers.
But that’s just me—you do you.
“Battle of the Bulge: Why We’re So Fascinated by Superhero Codpieces”
There’s one part of the superhero anatomy that fanboys have tried hard to ignore and yet can’t stop thinking about: The codpiece. And it’s no different for the men and women who strive to bring these superheroes to life on the big screen. Tim Grierson recounted the costume design struggle that is finding the perfect balance between realism and vulgarity whenever superhero dicks are involved. READ MORE
“The Boy That Fire Couldn’t Destroy: The Life and Death of Dave Dave”
This is the incredible story of Dave Dave, who, at the age of six, was doused in kerosene and set on fire by his own father in a motel room on a trip to Disneyland. And while Dave Dave’s attempted murder was horrifying, his career as a conceptual artist and lasting friendship with Michael Jackson also yielded something truly redeeming—a life well lived. READ MORE
“An Oral History of ‘GoldenEye 007’ on the N64”
Yesterday marked 21 years since one of Nintendo’s most iconic games, GoldenEye 007, first hit shelves. Since then, it’s spawned an entire genre of games, become a darling of the speedrunning community and inspired numerous memes. In honor of the groundbreaking first-person shooter, we reached out to the people who played, reviewed and created it to see how it all came together. READ MORE
“Jim ‘The Anvil’ Neidhart and the Ballad of Pro Wrestlers Who Die Shortly After ‘Getting Their Act Together’”
A couple of weeks ago, retired pro wrestler and notorious addict Jim Neidhart passed away at age 63 after a fall at his home. Neidhart, who had successfully completed his latest stint in rehab in 2015, was clean at the time. Unfortunately, after battling his worst impulses for more than 40 years, simply getting clean wasn’t enough. Instead, Neidhart joins a long, tragic list of wrestlers whose rough-and-tumble lives caught up with them just as things started looking up. READ MORE
Five Things We Learned This Week
- If you’re napping, you’re winning. Scientists announced this week that evolution is partly “survival of the laziest.” (I’m gonna go eat chips and watch Netflix; I’ll talk to y’all later, alright?)
- Mom and dad have discovered memes, and it’s a disaster. Baby Boomers have moved on from chain emails you need to forward to 100 people for good luck, only to shitpost image macros on Facebook that look like something out of 2012.
3. People are making cheese out of their belly button lint, and it’s really, really baaaad for you. We asked a dietitian to rank every kind of cheese by how (un)healthy it is for you, and human cheese came in last place—mostly because in addition to its slightly sour taste, you might also possibly be tasting staph. As in, staphylococcus bacteria. Gross!
4. We can probably stop being anxious over the size of our dicks now. All this time we’ve been watching porn and asking ourselves why our junk doesn’t also look like a genoa salami, but if you ask a scientist studying dick dysmorphia, it’s all in our heads. And he’s got the data to back it up.
5. Batman hates God. Okay, that might be a little strong. But recently DC Comics revealed that Batman is, in fact, an atheist—and we’re concerned. Not concerned that the Caped Crusader has loss his moral compass, but more that he’s completed his transition from the world’s greatest superhero to the world’s biggest Reddit Bro.
The Week in Quotes
The “standard” condom is 7 inches long. The average dick is 5 inches long. See a problem here? Big Condom is churning out rubbers that fit 50 percent of guys fine, but for the 35 percent of guys that need a smaller condom, there haven’t been very many options—until now.
Would you rather be overweight and cigarette-free, or a thin guy who puffs a pack of heaters everyday? These five guys are unapologetically the latter.
Much like Steve James’ seminal work, Hoop Dreams, his new 10-part series America to Me on Starz delves deep into race, class, education and community. We spoke to James about the series, what the national media gets wrong about Chicago and the one incredible death scene from his career he chose not to film.
A steady job as a security guard, or the freedom to record Instagram videos of your farts and unemployment? “Paul Flart,” internet hero, has chosen the farts, and we’re all better for it.
And Now, A Word From Our Readers
Possibly my favorite comment of the week. Bruh, it’s HPV, not string theory. Think I’m gonna stick with the doctors over your “educated guesses.”
This guy gets it.