It’s always amazed me that giant corporations continue to throw hundreds of thousands, if not millions, of dollars at consultants, as if those jokers know the first thing about a brand’s business and how to fix it. After all, every consultant I’ve ever met got fired from their job only to start “consulting” when they figured out no one was going to hire them.
Yeah, hey, I know a guy living in a van down by the river who’d gladly explain to you the Three B’s of good business or whatever easy-to-digest-but-equally-worthless panacea you’re willing to shell out big bucks for. Now, can I have a million-dollar finder’s fee?
Smh.
Must Read
“The Scourge of the ‘Didn’t Happen’ Dude”
Type “Didn’t Happen” into Twitter’s search function, and you’ll find a bunch of tweets, largely by women, recalling how stories about their everyday lives resulted in strange men accusing them of lying. And not mundane things, either — many of the women Hussein Kesvani spoke to explained how “Didn’t Happen” Dudes are a particular problem for those who have been harassed and abused, leaving them re-traumatized, and thanks to Twitter’s indifference, on their own to deal with it. READ MORE
‘Pay-to-Win’ is Gambling
A few years ago, game companies discovered that they could make money off of their customers by making things like character skins, guns and extra abilities available for a small fee. These “microtransactions” started as a way for video games to garner revenue from players who wanted a shortcut to victory. But for many, that urge to pay to win has turned small $1.99 charges on their credit cards into a five-figure addiction, and a billion-dollar business for the video game industry.
Hot Boys Summer?
In May, Houston-born rapper Megan Thee Stallion debuted her mixtape, Fever, to critical and cultural acclaim thanks in large part to the album’s “women-be-spendin’” single, “Cash Shit,” and igniting online what has turned into the catchphrase of the season: “Hot Girl Summer.”
Megan thee Stallion’s effortless/unintentional branding is really a case study in itself! “Drive the boat” “hot girl summer” etc. like these catchphrases are fucking everywhere, Megan is EVERYWHERE!!!
— Shelton Griffith (@flyrebel) July 8, 2019
Naturally, dudes being dudes, no sooner had Hot Girl Summer blown up social media then we started hearing about “Hot Boy Summer” — only, instead of being a fresh take, it’s mostly just guys living up to their worst instincts.
On the ‘Consultant’ Grift
Is there a bigger grift in business than the “management consultant”? You’d be hard-pressed to argue otherwise. Consultants are often hired to come into complex organizations and present a strategic plan for hiring, firing or overhauling working practices — but based on what, exactly? Chris Bourn describes how the corporate world got itself hooked on these expensive management-consulting drones, and why their “recommendations” are often useless.
I’m Not Crying, You’re Crying
There are few things as tear-jerking as “adoption papers” viral videos, but is it the same with kids who change their last names to those of their loving stepfathers? Well, grab a box of tissues, because you’re going to need ‘em: Quinn Myers spoke directly to people who took their stepdad’s last name to see what their thought process was, and how it changed their relationship, and yeah, it’ll make you cry like a baby.
My biological dad was a drug addict and physically abusive to my mother. 12 years ago, my stepdad brought the light into our world again. He’s always loved me and my sister as his own. And so we decided to change our last name this Father’s Day. I love you Dad. ? pic.twitter.com/q8XnmkypK1
— Jia ?? (@jialaurenxo) June 16, 2019
To Airbnb or Not Airbnb? That is the Question
Real estate can be a killer investment, assuming you’ve got the nut to afford it. Renting it out, cashing checks from tenants, all the while watching your property values increase over time (hopefully). But what’s the best way to collect all of that passive income, exactly? Meaning, should you rent out your place easy-peasy, or take the lucrative-yet-labor-intensive road and Airbnb it? With the help of real estate agent Areeal Randall, Adam Elder digs up some answers.
Not Hot Enough
When Marie Le Conte recently called Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s boyfriend ugly, there was a noticeable backlash against the journalist for making a cruel “joke.” Strangely, though, many saw that same backlash as ironic — because in the eyes of women often deemed “unfuckable” by their male counterparts, if the roles had been reversed, no one would’ve batted an eye. But is it actually true that men treat women they don’t find attractive cruelly and discourteously? Based on reaction to the Le Conte kerfuffle online, and the 40 or so women Madeleine Holden spoke with, there’s at least a feeling they do.
i'm assuming all the dudes currently going berserk because somebody said aoc's man is homely maintain that energy when their friends say monstrously cruel things to women they find unattractive lol
— Einstürzende Louboutin (@negaversace) May 4, 2019
Don’t Hurt Yourself
Wait — you’re telling me I can’t just walk in a weight room and pick up whatever dumbbell feels heavy and start lifting until I’m tired?
Yes, I am telling you that.
If you’re one of the many people who’ve decided to get off the couch and start lifting weights, I wrote a quick guide to understanding exactly how to determine how much weight you should lift, and over how many reps and how many sets. Because, bro, you don’t want to end up lifting for three months and not seeing any gains, or worse, hurting yourself. So heed my expertly sourced advice, mmk?
Butt Cuts Are Back, Bay Bay
Butt cutts, the famed coiffure with the part down the middle made popular by 1990s kids everywhere, has finally made us all proud and cruised back into style once more. From “Eboys” to TikTok to K-pop, Joe Longo charts where the look has surged back into the mainstream, and why it’s so popular again.
Jeff Gross
Jeff Gross is MEL’s senior editor for social media and content marketing. His daily ICYMI column, which chronicles all things meta on the site, is the quickest way to catch up on MEL, and the funniest thing you’ll read all day. Follow him on Twitter.
