It’s hopefully not news to you that sex will likely become more physically challenging beyond a certain age. Your stamina may not be what it was, your flexibility might dwindle and your heart will need to work harder and harder to get you, uh, hard. Most of these issues can be remedied, and there’s always Viagra. But does the human body ever reach a point where orgasms are simply no longer an option? Does it ever decide that keeping you alive is difficult enough, and that it’s time to shut down your pleasure parts?
Thank God, no.
“There’s no age barrier for men or women when it comes (no pun intended) to having an orgasm,” says Shasta Townsend, intimacy expert and founder of 7 Star Love, a sexual wellness consulting business for individuals and couples. “These aren’t biological or mental functions that deteriorate with age.”
However, she adds, “The ability to achieve orgasm, at any age, man or woman, does require a satisfying sex life — mind, body and emotions.” And the health of each of these components can indeed deteriorate to the point where orgasm may no longer be possible or even of interest, but there’s no definitive age where this becomes destiny.
“If the mind isn’t ‘turned-on’ or aroused, then it’s challenging to attain orgasm regardless of your age. But biology from an aging perspective doesn’t have to play into it,” Townsend explains. Moreover, should we feel bodily or emotionally less capable of reaching orgasm, there’s typically a solution. “Regardless of age or even length of time not having an orgasm, every single individual can learn how to have one and unleash the power of orgasm,” she says.
Even if someone struggles to achieve a traditional orgasm, particularly of the ejaculatory variety, there are still pleasurable alternatives. Indeed, Townsend’s husband Ian Lavalley specializes in teaching men how to experience “non-ejaculatory orgasms.” “Research on non-ejaculatory orgasms points again to the mind/body connection rather than a purely biological one,” he says. “This is about being connected to your partner, completely present with them, and setting an intention for mutual satisfaction until the very end, no matter the age.”
So no, there’s not some final stage of life where orgasm is certain to become unachievable. But even if you’re no longer physically capable of performing as you did, what matters more is your mental wellbeing. As long as you’re of sound mind, you can probably still find a way to orgasm up until the day you die — it just might look a bit different.