Today’s my 23rd birthday, which normally would be great news for all involved if today also didn’t happen to be the 10-year anniversary of one particularly legendary Kevin Smith tweet:
Ten years in and we bone like we're cheating on each other WITH each other. A decade-plus and her clit/brown/taint-area still pOwns my dick.
— KevinSmith (@ThatKevinSmith) July 9, 2009
God, Kevin, overshadow much?!?! Man, there’s just so much “there” there, ya know? You almost wish someone would pull the tweet apart and analyze it piece by piece. Which, of course, Miles Klee did.
You’re so very welcome.
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“‘Currycels’ and the Unsurprising Racism of the Incel Community”
Could it be that the hatred and anger incels harbor for women might stem from a place of prejudice toward other races, too? Judging by how they denigrate and isolate South Asian men — whom many white, Western incels see as “undeserving” of sex — the answer is a resounding “yes.” Hussein Kesvani spoke with a number of Indian incels about how they reconcile their second-class citizenship in the community with their overwhelming desire to be a part of it. READ MORE
Think You’re Cool? Try Learning Nine Languages
Moses McCormick has an impressive trick up his sleeve. He delights in encountering strangers –– families in grocery stores, Uber drivers, etc. –– and speaking to them in what he assumes to be their native language. McCormick is what’s known as a polyglot, in that he’s fluent in nine languages, and proficient in a few dozen or so more. He’s built a YouTube channel with more than 700,000 subscribers dedicated to showcasing the surprise (and delight) of the strangers he speaks to, as well as teaching others about the language-learning process. Eddie Kim profiled McCormick about the people he’s met and the addictiveness of being able to converse in a new tongue.
Stinking Immunity
Call ’em crazy, but some people are convinced that, like an addict’s tolerance for drugs, our bodies can become so “used” to our deodorant that it becomes ineffective. Their solution, then, is to switch up deodorant brands every few months. Thanks to the internet, it’s a theory on the rise. Like a lot of the dumb theories on the web, however, if it smells like bullshit (or a very stinky armpit), it probably is.
The Bad Men of ‘Midsommar’
Ari Aster’s latest horror flick Midsommar has it all: Ritual suicide, bear disembowelment and in horrifyingly typical fashion, dudes acting shitty. So while there’s plenty to be disturbed about throughout Midsommar, the real screamer is the chronic indifference and emotional dissonance the group of male “friends” perpetrate on the movie’s female lead (and each other). Say what you want about the film’s baddies — a Swedish commune with a taste for blood and psychedelics — at least they’re in tune with their emotions.
Toxic Roleplaying Is Taking Over Facebook
Now that actual “news” has all but disappeared from Facebook News Feeds, the only thing the social media network is good for are birthday notifications and “Groups” — particularly the roleplaying variety. Communities like “A Group Where We All Pretend to Be Boomers” and “A Group Where We All Pretend to Be Middle-Aged Soccer Moms” are supposed to be fun places where people can play pretend in an ironic, funny way. But it turns out even these innocuous groups can’t seem to avoid the social network’s notorious toxicity.
Keep Kissing Me, You Fool
Kissing skills are so closely tied to the success of a budding courtship because, at the outset, we do so much of it. Weirdly, though, the amount of deep kissing we do decreases the longer couples stay together — and can even disappear entirely. Sometimes, this can mark that a relationship is nearing its end. But like anything else, to understand why we stop kissing, you first have to understand why we start kissing in the first place.
Diary of a Shy Kid
No matter how outgoing you might be, sometimes your kid comes out the opposite. So what’s a parent to do? We asked a child therapist, a late-night announcer/formerly shy kid and a four-year-old how to help a kid come out of their shell.
Pop Quiz, Car Guy
So your lease is up, which means it’s time to go shopping for a new whip. Naturally, you’ve picked out a car and you’ve price-checked it on the manufacturer’s website. But strangely, when you go to the dealership, the salesman quotes you a wildly different price. So what gives?
A) There’s complicated math involved dictated by things no human is meant to understand like supply and demand, optional extras and cash promos.
B) Salesmen are just trying to confuse the shit out of you.
C) Car prices are affected by the phases of the moon.
D) All of the above.
The correct answer is… D! Well, kinda. Yes, there are a mind-numbing amount of variables that dictate a car’s final sale price; yes, salesmen want you dumb and blind so they can milk you of every last red cent; and yes, while prices aren’t affected by the phases of the moon per se, prices do fluctuate based on the time of year, month and even the day of the week. If that all sounds confusing, that’s exactly how dealers mean it to be. But don’t worry –– Jeff Gross interprets all this price-gauging bullshit to help you get the best deal possible.
Magdalene Taylor
Magdalene Taylor is a staff writer at MEL. She covers internet culture, sex and the online adult industry. She lives in Brooklyn but is from God's Country, Western Massachusetts.
