Few situations spell disaster like a fragile glass bong in the Dorito-dusted hands of a fully baked stoner. It’s almost certain that casualties will happen, and they’ll cost you your weed money when they do. There are, however, a number of precautions you can take to look after your adored bong. Smoke up and be careful as we learn how to not break your bong — at home and on the go.
Make Your Bong a Home in Your Home
Placing your bong somewhere random when you get up to scour the pantry is a recipe for disaster. Instead, pick a safe spot for your bong before you smoke, and put it there immediately after you’re done. “The best way to protect your bong around your house is to have a designated spot to put it,” says Nick, weed YouTuber and bong reviewer. “I’ve broken so many pieces by leaving them around my house in random spaces where they inevitably get knocked over. But now that I have a cabinet where I store all my glass, I can’t remember the last time I broke a piece.”
A cabinet is a good bet, but just make sure it’s up and out of the way. “Never put bongs on the floor,” says Erick Khan, fellow weed YouTuber and bong reviewer. “Always keep them on a counter or table. You can know your place like the back of your hand and [be able to] walk around blindfolded, but one day it’s going to get kicked over.” If you do keep your bong on a table or countertop, several bong wizards on r/glassheads suggest moodmats, which are essentially coasters for your bong that keep it from slipping around and damaging either itself or the surface it’s on.
Invest in a Bong Case or Bong Bag (or Make Your Own)
When you’re on the go, you definitely need something to give your bong plenty of padding. “Invest in a dedicated carrying case for your glass,” Khan says. “Pelican cases are very popular for pieces under eight inches, and there are plenty of bong carriers for bongs larger than that. It’s a lot more spacious and luxurious than bubble wrap in a grocery bag, which is what I used for so long.”
There’s nothing wrong with a DIY approach, however. “Whenever I take my bong on the go, I always wrap it in a towel and throw that in my backpack,” Nick says. “It’s not fancy, but I’ve never broken a bong on the go.” Or as one bong fanatic in r/glassheads tells me, “Pool noodles can be cut up and rigged as shipping protection.” That’s some real high innovation right there.
Learn How to Clean a Glass Bong Carefully
There are few different ways to clean a bong (read our guide here), and pretty much all of them involve a slippery liquid. For that reason, the stakes are high when you’re cleaning your bong, so you need to be extra cautious. “Take your time when cleaning your bong and its components,” Nick says. “I’ve broken quite a few pieces during cleaning, either accidentally knocking it against my sink or dropping a wet downstem.” (It’s also probably a good idea to wait until after your bong is clean before blazing phat.)
Speaking of bong cleaning, Khan relays a sweet tip: “Use a store-bought degreaser instead of ‘420 Bong Cleaners’ from the headshop. They just buy degreasers available at Home Depot and repackage them with fancy packaging and 300 percent increases in prices. Huge gallons are only a few bucks at hardware stores.”
- Read Next: How to Sober Up From Weed Edibles
If You’re Ultra Clumsy, Consider a Silicone Bong
If you can’t stop breaking bongs no matter how careful you are, silicone bongs are a great option. You can bend them, put them in the dishwasher, throw them off the Empire State Building — whatever you do, they’ll survive, and they’re usually pretty cheap, too.
Happy smoking! And, uh, you got any more of those Doritos?
Ian Lecklitner
Ian Lecklitner is a staff writer at MEL Magazine. He mostly writes about everyone's favorite things: Sex, drugs and food.
