Hate to break it to you, my stoner comrade, but the pipe you’re smoking weed out of is an actual swamp, infested with moist, decaying nug bits and menacing germs. It could make you sick, or worse: Make your bud taste bad. So, in an effort to help you smoke better, Gordon Loi, creator of VITAE Glass customizable bongs, is teaching us how to clean a weed pipe — or rather, all weed pipes, no matter what shape or size.
What You’ll Need
First, you’ll need some kind of cleaning solution. There are pipe-specific ones, like Formula 420, but Loi says a mixture of isopropyl alcohol (of above 97 percent) and coarse salt work just as well. If that sounds too harsh, Mile High Cleaner sells a “healthy” plant-based alternative.
If you’re cleaning a small pipe, you’ll also want a sealable bag or container. For larger pipes, like bongs, cleaning caps or plugs are a must (unless you want to make your own with Saran Wrap and rubber bands).
Besides all that, a bottle brush set can come in handy if you really want to get in there. Even better, Mile High Cleaner has magnetic scrubbers, which make easy work of brushing the inside of your bong from the outside.
How It’s Done
Cleaning small pipes goes like this:
- Place it in your bag or container.
- Fill the bag or container with the cleaning solution of your choice.
- Let it soak for a few hours — more or less, depending on how swampy it is.
- Give it a good shake.
- Put your bottle brushes to work if necessary.
- Rinse with warm water.
- Dry it well so your weed doesn’t get wet.
- Smoke a sweet, sweet bowl.
For bongs and other large pipes, follow the same process, but instead of placing them in a container, use them as the container. So, you’ll fill the bong itself with your cleaning solution, then use plugs (or Saran Wrap and rubber bands) to seal the holes.
Another tip you might consider after cleaning a water pipe is adding a couple drops of MCT oil to the clean water. It keeps gunk from clinging to the inside of the glass, making for an easier clean next time around.
Making It Easier
If you’re an especially lazy stoner — hey, no judgment — Loi recommends getting yourself a pipe that comes apart. That way, you can clean its innards without much hassle. HØJ and Bowlz both offer pipes like this, which easily split into pieces for an incredibly convenient cleaning.
Simple as that. Next up: Cleaning your entire apartment.
Ian Lecklitner
Ian Lecklitner is a staff writer at MEL Magazine. He mostly writes about everyone's favorite things: Sex, drugs and food.
