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The Deepest Desires of the Would You Fuck My Wife? Subreddit Aren’t What You Think

Sure, there are plenty of men who want to be cucked there. But it’s just as much about boosting women’s confidence and stoking people’s excitement about the desirability of their wives

If you’re looking for specific facts or advice, Google is the obvious place to find answers. What year did “Tubthumping” by Chumbawamba come out? What’s the best way to patch a hole in a pair of jeans? What, exactly, is in an Egg McMuffin? But sometimes, what you yearn for is opinion, the subjective thoughts of strangers online relating to your situation alone. For times like these, it’s best to turn to Reddit. Such is the case with a question that plagues hundreds of thousands of husbands across the land: Would you fuck my wife?

On r/WouldYouFuckMyWife, these husbands can pose this query to a wide and voracious audience of more than 628,000. And, crucially, you — yes, you — can help provide an answer. The general formula of the subreddit involves a husband (or boyfriend, non-binary partner, girlfriend or wife) posting pictures of their female partners and asking the community whether they’d have sex with them. “What do you think of my 36-year-old wife?” one recent post featuring a picture of a blonde woman bent over on a couch in a thong asks. “You’d fuck her, right?” All types of people respond, primarily with the answer “yes.”

In order to be allowed to post on the subreddit, one must first be “verified” by the moderators. The process of verification involves submitting at least three photos of the woman in question, and she has to be holding a crumpled piece of paper with the date and user’s Reddit name on it. (The crumpling of the paper helps ensure that the writing isn’t edited or Photoshopped.) All of this helps prove that the person being posted about actually wants their image shared. In the past, this wasn’t necessarily the case, and the subreddit has been accused of distributing images without the subject’s consent (other subreddits like r/Cuckik continue to have this problem). Currently, however, r/WouldYouFuckMyWife is composed entirely of consenting parties who enjoy the thrill of being sexualized by strangers online. 

“We both find it somewhat erotic and sexy when other men crave her just based on an image or quick video,” says redditor AlbinoCaveman, who regularly shares photos of his wife on the subreddit as well as in others like r/GoneWildCouples. For them, these subreddits are about enjoying the fantasy of incorporating others into their sex life, as opposed to actually doing so. “We occasionally use the comments and messages as a bit of foreplay,” he continues. “For example, one of the kinkier fantasies we play into is double penetration. If there are people commenting on that desire, we will play into it in our sex life, maybe with toys and dirty talk.”

As is the case on most of Reddit, blonde, thin, white women are especially popular on the sub — the top three posts from the last month are of women who generally fit this description. Usually, the women are in their 30s, and more often than not, their faces are hidden. Many of the posts mention that the wife in question is a mother, either in an attempt of highlighting her MILF status or to confirm for her that she’s still hot post-childbirth. “Thirty-one years and mother of two, still fuckable?” one of the most popular posts on the subreddit asks. “Wife thinks she’s getting fat, would you fuck my wife?” says another

Both feature women who easily meet conventional standards of thinness and beauty. What these examples highlight, however, is how subreddits like r/WouldYouFuckMyWife are often used as a way of encouraging women to feel sexy about their bodies, typically in the context of motherhood or aging. The highest-ranked post of all time is of Mrs. Poindexter, a mom in her 40s who eventually built up a multi-million-dollar OnlyFans following after being encouraged by her husband to share sexy photos on Reddit to help with her self-esteem. So while many guys get off on the idea of strangers wanting to fuck their wives, the subreddit also works to invigorate couples’ sex lives, simply by making the woman feel desired. 

Likewise, numerous couples use the subreddit to connect with other people interested in cuckoldry, swinging or threesomes, as well as a means of promoting an OnlyFans account or other adult content. Another member of the subreddit, MyWifeLikesItBig, tells me that the subreddit served as a way of introducing his cucking fetish to his wife. Now, she’s one of the top-ranked amateur performers on XVideos under the name Janedro23. r/WouldYouFuckMyWife is just another way for them to share their content to a potentially paying audience. 

This latter usage points to a trend: While not everyone on r/WouldYouFuckMyWife is an overt cuck, the cuck-adjacent activity of showing your wife off has become increasingly mainstream (the ever-popular “wife guy” is an SFW offshoot). And though the desire to do so is nothing new — cuckoldry, wife-swapping and swinging are as old as dirt — leveraging it on such a public, interactive scale is. After all, in some circles, the word “cuck” is still a bitter insult. Men who can’t keep a lid on their libidinous wives are still called “betas,” and women are still shamed for leaning into their sexual desires. Screaming “Would you fuck my wife?!?” into the void is an inversion of that shame; it’s an admission that you’re big enough to share, even if it’s all just fantasy. More people than ever are feeling it, too — over the last three years, r/WouldYouFuckMyWife has more than tripled in size. 

If anything, subreddits like it help normalize existing kinks and present easy avenues for exploration, even if the fantasies never materialize. But more importantly, they show that we do want our partners to feel desired, not just by us, but by the world at large. This marks a small shift in the jealousy and possessiveness that have plagued relationships for so long. Thanks to r/WouldYouFuckMyWife and its brethren, we no longer have to fear the threat of others wanting our partners — we can lean right into it, and even use it to invigorate our own lifes. It’s a win-win for everybody. 

So let me ask you again: Would you fuck my wife?