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In Defense of Missionary, the Meme War Between Chevy and Ford Bros, and ‘Game of Thrones’ Tattoo Regrets

It’s time we all just come out and say it: Missionary is a perfectly acceptable sex position. Not every romp needs to be a freaking rollercoaster ride; sometimes you just gotta get the job done. And personally, I love putting in zero effort. Also, let’s not forget the simple truth that missionary can be just as fun and exciting as reverse upside-down cowgirl if you make it fun and exciting. Like, did you know missionary increases the odds that your female partner will reach a clitoral orgasm?

Unfortunately, society’s relationship with the position is complicated. Many see it embodying some very old-fashioned views of sexuality. But as Miles Klee argues, we’re letting that stigma get in the way of a position that’s actually mad decent.

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“There’s a Hilarious Ongoing Meme War Between Ford and Chevy Truck Owners”
The rivalry between Ford and Chevy truck owners has been ongoing for more than 60 years. Like an allegiance to a sports team, opinions over which truck is better, or more “macho,” is completely tribal. And now, a divide that’s existed since long before the internet is playing out in the most “2019” way possible: memes. READ MORE

A Film Critic On…  ‘John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum’

On what it is, basically: “John has found himself drawn back into his old life, discovering that returning to his former profession is a lot easier than getting back out.”

On what in the hell a ‘parabellum’ is:  “It’s a kind of firearm cartridge credited to Georg Luger, the man behind the namesake pistol. But the cartridge’s name came from a Latin expression, si vis pacem, para bellum, which means ‘If you want peace, prepare for war.’”

On doing it live: “Modern movies rely so much on CG, wirework and other tricks that we start to doubt everything on screen. Not so with John Wick: Chapter 3.”

On ‘it’s getting a little ridiculous, guys’: “John Wick kills people in so many clever ways in this movie. He has random horses kick evil henchmen in the head. And a pair of ferocious dogs boasts have an extraordinary ability to zero in on bad guys’ crotches and bite down hard.”

On exuberance: “I laugh because I can’t believe what I’m seeing — and I’m just so happy to be alive to witness it.”

On not feeling too bad that you just watched a little over two hours of murder porn:John Wick: Chapter 3 isn’t turning us into soulless monsters. But it is letting us safely relish in the bloodlust that PG-13 films try to sanitize.”

Read more of Tim Grierson’s review of John Wick: Chapter 3 – Parabellum hereincluding Grierson’s quibble with the film’s baffling title; why the world needs more of the film’s hilarious madman, Jason Mantzoukas; and a breakdown of Wick 3 co-star Angelica Huston’s incredible “upstairs coke” interview with New York magazine.

Silencing LGBTQ Sex Ed on YouTube

For many in the LGBTQ community, YouTube has become the resource to receive sexual education free of the heteronormative tropes they’d likely be taught in school. Creators break down things like consent, where to buy affordable kinky items and post how-to videos on preparing for anal. But often, these videos are flagged by YouTube as inappropriate despite not violating any specific guidelines. Not only does this hurt creators — whose videos are demonetized, and thus, don’t make them any money — but it further inhibits an underserved viewership from getting the chance to learn vital information about the kind of sex they’re having, and the risks involved. Naturally, YouTube blames it on the algorithm. But it seems that something more nefarious might be at play.

Move Over, Adderall

Trying to work smarter, not harder, eh? Adderall used to be the drug for that, but a number of new brain-enhancing drugs have cropped up in recent years, each allegedly making you work better without Adderall’s telltale edginess or addictiveness. In a recent study, 30 percent of Americans said they’d tried some type of work drug in the last year, from nootropics like Provigil, to boring old nicotine, to expired Soviet space drugs. Still, the future of chemical “enhancements” is uncertain, and it’s unclear how, or if, the law will ever allow us to be microdosing in the workplace.

Gotta Go Gotta Go Gotta Go Right Now

So, you’ve gotta poop. We’ve all been there, lemme tell ya. Thing is, maybe you’re in an important meeting, or on a hot date, or perhaps, in any other number of situations where pooping isn’t really an option, and the only thing to do, the only thing you CAN do, is to hold it. That might work occasionally, but repeatedly resisting the urge to shit can fuck up your rectum. Take long-haul truckers, for example: These road warriors often experience chronic constipation because their rectums get stretched out from ignoring the need to poop. You don’t want a stretched out rectum, do you? Of course not, so stop ignoring the warning signs and poop when you need to.

From Sneezy to Snoozy

Only the Diphenhydramine HCI in Benadryl actually blocks histamines — i.e., the things that make you sneeze or form a rash — but weirdly, there are still 10 other listed ingredients inside those pink capsules:

What possible reason could the makers of Benadryl have for putting plant fiber, wood pulp and laxatives in your allergy medication? Allow us to explain.

At This Point, Re-Making ‘Catch-22’ is a Catch-22

Most war movies are ultimately about something else, like masculinity or loss of innocence. According to Tim Grierson, though, the George Clooney-produced Hulu miniseries Catch-22 seems to just be about World War II. Despite being well-cast, well-directed and well-put-together, the show still feels like another rehash of what we already know.

How’s That Game of Thrones Ink Holding Up?

To say that the final season of Game of Thrones didn’t pan out as expected would be an understatement. Case in point: One of the most dramatic and outlandish character developments happens to Daenerys Targaryen, the slave-turned-queen who spends most of the series battling to reclaim the Iron Throne. Early in the show, she seems graceful and kind, someone who frees oppressed people; some superfans adored her so much, they got tattoos of her. Thing is, Daenerys’ benevolent image didn’t quite, ahem, hold up. Yet while some of those tattooed people find it kind of silly now, most still don’t regret the ink given that the show is over.

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