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#MeToo in the Porn Industry, Moth Memes and Texts from Trump

Dear Mr. President,

My name is Jeff Gross, and I work in media. More specifically, I work for a men’s magazine within which you’re often featured. It’s my job to keep up with your goings on. I have an alert set up on my phone so that I know when you fat-finger your tweets from your toilet. This is all to say, I see and hear too much of you already—I DO NOT WANT YOU TO SEND TEXT MESSAGES TO MY PHONE. I don’t care if these texts are for emergencies only. Personally, I’d prefer a tornado drop a house on my head Wicked Witch-style than know you can send me unblockable alerts.

This is me, pressing 🖕to opt out.

Warmest regards,
Jeff

P.S.: Have you heard of MEL? Because if not, you should check out all of today’s best stories below!

Must Read

Why It’s So Hard to Bring the #MeToo Movement to Porn
With the notable exception of porn star James Deen, the porn industry has largely gotten a pass from the #MeToo movement. But unlike pro sports, porn’s reasons are tied up with its less-than-savory realities: Like the fact that sex is an intrinsic part of the industry; and that survivors are afraid to come forward because porn already struggles with negative stereotypes. Tierney Finster caught up with three porn performers with particularly unique perspectives (and experiences) on the topic. READ MORE

Booker v. Kavanaugh

Speaking of #MeToo, Cory Booker is no stranger to sexual misconduct. And yet, the junior senator from New Jersey is one of the loudest voices calling for an investigation into Brett Kavanaugh’s alleged sexual assault(s). So what’s the difference between the two men that allows Booker to weigh in on a topic that he himself has a history with? As Tracy Moore writes, it begins with the fact that Booker self-reported his wrongdoing; but in reality, it goes far deeper than that.

I Love Lamp

Moth memes are so hot right now among the Very Online.

And while the half-life of any popular meme is barely a fortnight, this particular meme has had the wonderful side-effect of increasing offline interest in its very real-life subject: Moths. And for someone who is both Very Online and afraid of moths—like Miles Klee—this is a welcome turn of events.

Do Svidaniya, ‘Star Wars’ Trolls

Remember how fucking pissed everyone was about The Last Jedi? Yeah… about that. According to media/technology scholar Morten Bay, that was largely the effort of political trolls. Specifically, the Russian kind.

So why would a bunch of “bots, trolls/sock puppets or political activists” originating in Россия care about Luke Skywalker’s relationship with the Force? Three words: White. Male. Resentment.

Seven-Minute Abs

Does going to the gym for up to an hour every day give you crippling anxiety? Perhaps a micro-workout is for you! After all, new research suggests that quick, high-intensity bursts of energy—like what you might get from sprinting for 20 seconds three times, or spreading 100 burpees out over the course of a day—can have the same benefit as traditional training.

Illiterate in America

While educational achievement has improved over the last 30 years, not much has changed in the number of American adults who can’t read. In fact, approximately 32 million people, or 14 percent of the country, are functionally illiterate. And while there are plenty of reasons why young people fall through the cracks in our education system, the effect that massive number has on our economy, on our homelessness problem and on our healthcare system can no longer be ignored.

Great, Now the President Can Text Us Directly

It’s bad enough that I have to hear about this clown on Twitter, on the news and all across the internet, but now the fucker can hmu directly? Don’t we already get government alerts on our phones? Why the heck do we need a Presidential Alert System? Glad you, er, I asked.

When Giant Dildos Attack…

At what point is a dildo too big? Probably when doctors are forced to invent a lasso-like device to remove a 23-incher lodged deep inside your rectum. But how did we get to that point? And if sticking giant objects up your ass is your idea of a good time, what kind of precautions should you be taking? We asked a clinical sexologist and the manager of an online adult retailer for their advice.

Wash Your Poop Hands, Ya Animals

Here’s something that’ll blow your mind: A new study has found that one in six men who take a shit at work don’t always wash their hands afterward. WTF! Guys: If you ever want to get laid ever again, wash your stinking mitts—and not just when you touch your wee-wee or drop a deuce—wash them all the time, because shit gets on everything.