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A Very Thicc Caloric Breakdown of Your Average Breakfast Burrito

It’s too many, but I’m gonna eat them anyway. YOLO

Breakfast burritos are both a blessing and a curse. On the one hand, they satiate you for hours, if not days. On the other, they’re caloric bundles of epic proportions. How many calories are we talking about, though?

Gobble an egg while we do some calculations.

How Many Calories in a Breakfast Burrito: The Numbers

Here are the most common ingredients you’ll find in a breakfast log, along with their estimated calorie counts:

  • The Tortilla: 210 calories
  • The Eggs: Two eggs amount to 182 calories.
  • The Meat: A breakfast burrito typically contains less meat than a non-breakfast burrito because it already has eggs. On average, it should boast about two ounces. That means 305 calories of bacon, 150 of ham and/or 196 of sausage.
  • The Cheese: A quarter cup of shredded Mexican cheese has 100 calories.
  • The Hash Browns: Two ounces is 185 calories.
  • The Peppers, Onions and Spinach: Somewhere near 50 calories altogether.
  • The Beans: No matter which beans you choose — black, pinto or refried — two ounces is around 52 calories.
  • The Guacamole: Two tablespoons comes to 45 calories.
  • The Salsa: Pico de gallo has five calories per tablespoon, so a few dollops should land you near 15 calories. It’s the same for most other salsas, too.
  • The Sour Cream: 23 calories per tablespoon

Adding all this together, a pretty beefy breakfast burrito — bacon, eggs, cheese, hash browns, beans and all the accompaniments — comes to 1,167 calories. That’s about half of what your average woman should eat in a day and just over a third of what your average dude should send down his gullet.

Calories in Your Favorite Fast-Food Breakfast Burritos

If you’re wondering how that compares to what’s offered at your favorite early-morning drive-thru, here’s what their most popular burritos come to:

I’ll take one of each.

How to Build a Low-Calorie Breakfast Burrito

Honestly, ditch the meat and hash browns. Eggs, cheese, veggies and salsa wrapped in a tortilla is still a plenty hearty breakfast.

Alternatively, you can always cut your breakfast burrito in half and give one to me.