Article Thumbnail

Condoms Now Actually Fit Dicks

The good, the bad and the ugly things we learned about our bodies today

The hardworking, blue-collar condom hasn’t really changed much since the invention of latex in 1920. Sure, there’s the ribbed (for her pleasure) varieties, as well as glow-in-the-dark and flavored, but when it comes to sizes, condoms are pretty much the same: Small, medium and large.

Unfortunately, today’s condom sizes are mostly an exercise in wishful thinking. According to a study out of Indiana University a few years ago, a whopping 83 percent of men’s dicks aren’t long enough to even fit in a standard condom. In fact, as The New York Times reported yesterday, the FDA mandates that standard condoms be at least 6.69 inches in length, while the average man is only 5.57 inches — a full inch shorter. No wonder guys aren’t that wild about them.

But the FDA seems to have learned from their mistakes over the last year, and has begun approving a larger range of condom sizes. The Times piece focuses on the efforts of custom condom manufacturer Global Protection Corp, makers of myONE Perfect Fit, who were a key part of lobbying the FDA to alter regulations. MyONE, which offers 60 distinct sizes of condoms of varying lengths and girths — 4.9 to 9.4 inches and 3.5 to 5 inches, respectively — recommends that you measure your junk to ensure a, well, perfect fit.

Thankfully, this condom-size revolution means that the days of “sorry, babe, it just came off” may soon be a thing of the past.

A few other things we learned about our bodies today: