As you can probably tell from the name, Reddit’s r/BigDickProblems is a subreddit dedicated to huge schlongs. In a world full of size queens, it’d be easy to assume that these schlongs would be viewed as blessings, but the users of r/BigDickProblems don’t agree. From fears of causing pain during sex to the trials and tribulations of finding condoms and underwear that fit, plenty of these well-hung folks clearly need a place to vent.
“It’s basically a page I made as a college kid after seeing the need for a place like this,” an anonymous moderator tells me. “A place where we could discuss the issues with size that wouldn’t devolve into a literal dick-measuring contest or a thirst trap. Also, I wanted to make dick jokes.”
Still, r/BigDickProblems makes it clear that it’s an SFW forum designed solely for the purpose of discussion, anecdotes and rants. Or more simply put, it’s a place to talk about dicks, not show them off, and there are rules against posting porn and “objectifying members.” Yet, despite the no-photo dictum, it seems that r/BigDickProblems has a serious dick pic problem — and people aren’t happy about it.
Dick pics are rarely posted on the sub’s homepage, but I chatted with a few users who say they regularly get unsolicited cock from other members in their DMs. This has been an issue for a long-time — there are posts from years ago begging for a “no dick pic” sticky thread, which would immediately tell new users to keep their junk to themselves. “Seriously, I’ve seen two today and it’s annoying,” writes one guy in a post shared three years ago. “This isn’t a porn Reddit. Just in general, don’t send unsolicited dick pics. We are not soliciting dick pics here. Take it elsewhere.”
In a public reply to the original post, another dude downplays the regularity of nudes before hastily correcting himself. “It’s not enough of an epidemic to warrant a sticky,” he writes. “Actually a sticky might be warranted until August/September. I forgot how hard Summer Reddit hits this sub.” There are plenty of more recent examples, too — just this week, a trans woman shared that she was getting DMs from guys asking to see her dick.
At the moment, r/BigDickProblems’ moderators can’t do much to address their dick pic difficulties, nor do they have the jurisdiction to shut down intrusive accounts. These unpaid forum managers are left to rely on Reddit’s admin staff, who aren’t always helpful when it comes to following up on reports. Keeping on top of these reports is like one huge, endless game of Whac-A-Mole — the minute you delete one cock, another appears out of nowhere. It’s also not an issue exclusive to the r/BigDickProblems subreddit, either. “DM harassment is an issue site-wide, and has been for some time,” the moderator continues, saying “similar conversations” crop up on other subreddits like r/MakeUpAddiction and r/BigBoobProblems all the time. He’s not sure exactly how common dick pics are on his sub, but speculates that “abusive behavior goes up during the holidays” — with more free time during the holiday season, more dudes just can’t resist spamming random inboxes with unprovoked peen.
This brings up an interesting question: In a subreddit dedicated to dicks, where do you draw the line? After all, it’s easy to argue that scrolling across the occasional cock on a penis forum is kind of an occupational hazard, and that dick pics can be acceptable in some contexts — educational, for example. “That’s actually how it started out,” the moderator says. “At first, I wanted the space to be very open and unassuming, letting people post freely. I was thinking that clinical images and other sorts non-sexual renderings would be helpful to folks.”
It turned out to be a bad idea, though — before long, guys were being asked for dick pics left, right and center, whether they were happy to share or not. “The original poster should only be asked for a pic once, or else it becomes harassment,” the mod continues. “Worse still, some people aren’t happy taking ‘no’ for an answer.” The mods also take the view that users post dick pics “to take advantage of [their] user base for pleasure” — i.e., they get a kick out of showing off their well-hung members to unsuspecting strangers.
Seemingly, though, plenty of guys wouldn’t mind seeing the occasional dick pic for educational purposes, especially if the pics were marked as NSFW. “I think pics still have a place here,” writes one guy, listing a few examples of appropriate contexts. “Do these undies fit? Are these pants appropriate for work? I’m concerned about the curve of my member or the way my foreskin retracts, so here’s a pic to demonstrate since it’s very hard to verbally describe a penis with all the variation there is.” Theoretically, this isn’t totally out of the question. “If someone has something that’s helpful but NSFW, we’d generally be open to reference it, with appropriate content warnings,” the moderator concludes.
As it stands, the sub’s mods try their best to keep on top of deleting dick pics, and for the most part, they keep the main page pretty clean. “When most people see that this subreddit isn’t about thirst, just discussion and support, they realize that dick pics are inappropriate,” the mod continues. “That said, this is the internet, and horny men have terrible reading comprehension. Realistically, they don’t even look where they’re posting. I suspect they take a photo they like and spam it to every sub with ‘dick’ in the name.”
FWIW: Not everyone is pissed about receiving dick pics. In a lengthy FAQ thread, a woman who regularly browses r/BigDickProblems runs through a series of questions other members commonly ask her about big dicks. For example: “What size dick made you cum the hardest?” (“None, that came from oral,” she writes.) “How many size queens do you know?” (Just the one.) It’s a hugely useful, myth-busting thread for guys with hang-ups about their penises, but it’s also one in which she makes her stance on unsolicited dick pics crystal clear. “I don’t have any feelings about [them], but I also have nothing to say to those guys,” she writes. “Why should I have any kind of response to such a pathetic attempt at power? I don’t care to waste time on them, especially when some of you have been truly delightful and I’m glad we became friends.”
In other words, it’s not just about the dick pic — it’s about consent, as well as when and why it’s being sent. “Most of the guys who DM me are polite, respectful and seem to appreciate [my replies], which is absolutely because our sex education is a joke,” she concludes. “I have never minded answering the embarrassing questions, and I will continue to do so.”
Sounds like a big dick solution to me.
Jake Hall
Jake Hall is a freelance journalist, fashion features editor and author. Their debut book 'The Art of Drag' is scheduled for release in May 2020.
