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This Week in Dudes

From sex in tiny houses to stacking Cheerios on their kids’ heads, the things men did this week

They said it couldn’t be done! First, this incredible link roundup (and yet, here I am, back in action). Second, male contraception. But we’re doing it: “Contraline, founded by University of Virginia graduate Kevin Eisenfrats and UVA professor of cell biology and biomedical engineering John Herr, raised $700,000 this spring to begin testing its product in rats, which will produce data it can present to the FDA.” Finally, some male rat feminists up in this joint. God knows we need to chill on the procreation, what with dudes sticking dominoes up their dicks and this guy just casually giving away his sperm from a public bathroom. Come and get it while it’s hot!

If a stranger’s public bathroom sperm isn’t for you, that’s cool; how about having sex in a tiny home? These people are doing it, albeit carefully: “Unsurprisingly, missionary was the most cited sexual position for the majority of tiny home residents I spoke with.” An extremely small space should be the perfect contraception — which you won’t want, according to a recent study, if you’re having sex with a hot person. According to another study, free condoms for teens actually doesn’t do anything. at all.

Yikes. Other cool ways to attract a mate: Be a male model with (fake?) zits, be a person under 30 with a good handshake, be a woman with long hair, be a dude who prefers experiences over things:

Whether women are being encouraged to rid our homes of useless belongings, or urged to shop for new ones, the result is the same: Society continues to associate women with the home and the material, men with the outside and experiences. While the enjoyment of domestic life, of stuff, isn’t inherently negative, it is dismissed precisely because of its associations with the feminine. An orientation towards stuff over experiences, moreover, gets cast either as recklessly materialist or, as Tony perceives it, an impediment to enjoying life. The only constant is that what women prefer, or are imagined to prefer, is thought inferior.

For those of you who failed at preventing procreation, hope you had a grand Father’s Day! Whether you spent it stacking Cheerios on your child’s head, fighting the good fight for paid parental leave, arguing with anyone who will listen about the “best” BBQ or wondering exactly why mom got more love for Mother’s Day… Let’s be honest, they deserve it more.

Perhaps it would be better if we all just shut up.

Great idea, Heidi!