You might expect that some men would feel emasculated after being proposed to by their girlfriends, since men are historically — and yes, currently — the ones who usually do the proposing. According to CBS, only five percent of people who are currently married say that the woman was the one who popped the big question (and the report is unclear as to whether this includes same-sex couples).
But according to the vast majority of male commenters in this popular Reddit thread asking men who were proposed to by their girlfriends how they felt about that turn of events, most appear to have actually thoroughly appreciated being on the receiving end.
Here are some of our favorite excerpts from the thread (sic, obviously, throughout)…
Hold onto your seats (and your butthole) as commenter Azrolicious explains how his significant other not only became his girlfriend while he was displaying his posterior tunnel, but also became his fiancée in the very same fashion:
“Okay so a few weeks after we met, we were taking a shower together and she corners me and says ‘so are we dating? Are you okay with us dating? It’s okay if you say no. Will you be my boyfriend?’
“Of course being the absolute specimen of an gentleman that I am (/s) I say ‘well you caught me with my butt hole out, I can’t say no.’
“Fast forward 4 years. We are camping. The nearest town is 60 miles away, the car is a few miles away, it’s cold, and…………I’m changing clothes. I’m butt naked in the tent.
“She says ‘so baby I’ve been thinking.’ I say ‘oh lord let me at least put my pants on.’ She says ‘could you see yourself marrying me?’ ‘Have you thought about it before?’ ‘Will you marry me?’
“I said ‘well you caught me with my butthole out, I can’t say no!’
“She thought that was hilarious, then we had a good long chat about it. On track for getting married in April. I think it’s pretty cool that she did it both times. Definitely made my life easier and I’m sure I’m under appreciating the clarity.”
In response to the prompt, which again, asked how men felt about being proposed to by their girlfriends, commenter evilbrent writes, “Pretty good about it I guess because I said yes. Even better now because 20 years or so later I get to say ‘hey this was YOUR idea.’” Well, he’s not wrong.
After commenter RadioBlinsk finishes his final exam, his girlfriend proposes to him in an epic fashion, making him the happiest man ever — not once, but twice — in the same day:
“Long story if you are interested: It was the day of my final exam of my 3 year apprenticeship. She took the day off and was more nervous than me when we had coffee together. I was sure she was nervous for the same reason as I was and didn’t pay much attention as my mind was occupied by the exam. 2 hours later: I passed the exam and we were standing outside with a colleague having a smoke and talking. And talking. And another cigarette. I was just so relieved and felt light as air and happy to not have a single thing on my mind than ‘I did it’. My girlfriend though was shuffling her feet not really taking part in the conversation. After what must have been hours for her she asked what I wanted to do. Going downtown, shopping or grab something to eat, I didn’t care at all! She drove to the record store first. We walked to the window to have a look at the recordplayers as we were thinking about getting a new one. ‘How do you like that one?’ she asked pointing at one in the back. There was sign next to it with my name on it. And bright as I am I said ‘It has my name on it’ ‘What else?’ It had ‘Let’s face the music and dance’ written on it. I just stared blank at it and then at her having not the foggiest. She said ‘Now that you are a Technician I wanted to ask you if you also want to be my man?’ I said I would love to! Hugs and kisses. When I looked at the player again I noticed three of the staff standing behind it smiling and cheering with a bottle of Champaign and glasses. It was a 11/10 day!”
“It was humbling,” commenter FFaw writes. “She had a learning disability and wrote, and then read out loud her proposal. She was terrified of blowing it, and it was the most important moment in her life. We were both in our forties, and I was blown away because after being with her for seven years, I didn’t know how important it was to her. We’re in our sixties now. Still humbled.” *tears of joy roll down cheeks*
Sit back as commenter djstizzle recounts how his girlfriend proposed to him during a music festival before he ever had the chance:
“She did it on my golden birthday at a music festival, so needless to say i was quite inebriated. Right before she did it, we sat on a bench and she asked me ‘So, how are you feeling?’
I replied ‘Fuuuuucked up!’
Then she got on one knee, and i started crying… it’s two years later and we’re still doing the same shenanigans without the proposing and crying. I feel a complete indifference that she was the one to do it. People are almost always shocked when they hear it. Except my dad’s family, they’re so open and awesome. But honestly with my semi apparent commitment issues i may never have done it in the long run who knows, so better that she did!”
Commenter team_player_of_one explains how he got proposed to and married within a single week:
“She just said one day, ‘hey wana get married?’ ‘Ah yeah, sort it out if you want’ We got married the next Friday at the courthouse. Had a few beers at the local pub and went home.
“We are pretty relaxed”
Commenter Sir_Hapstance chronicles how he (and his now-wife) enjoyed getting ragged by a conservative blogger after posting a video of her proposing to him on YouTube:
“I loved it, but I also kinda asked for it. We’d been together for almost seven years (and had talked about marriage a lot) when we brought up the idea of actually tying the knot. We both thought that it would feel weird to do a standard surprise proposal because we’d already felt like we’d been married for years. Somehow I got the idea in my head that if one of us were to propose, it should be her… perhaps because she’d taken the lead early in our relationship, too. She seemed to love the idea and told me to forget we ever had the conversation, which I promptly did.
“A few months later, she proposed while were out at the beach with her family and it was pretty damn great. (proposal vid for those curious.)
“Interestingly enough, despite it all being my idea, I guess I came across as awkward and uncomfortable in the video — or at least enough so to draw the attention of a conservative women’s blog that posted it and ragged on my wife pretty hard, basically saying it was the weirdest thing they’d ever seen. A bunch of judgmental followers of the blog chimed in too, bemoaning my wife’s humiliating, ‘emasculating’ actions, much to our bemusement (and amusement).
“I know it’s uncommon, but I think it’s honestly weird that a woman proposing to a man is still seen as some kind of statement. I’d love to see it completely normalized and viewed as nothing more than a romantic expression. As someone who isn’t great with words on the spot, not only was I thrilled to receive such a wonderful surprise but it was also an absolute blessing to have the responsibility of proposing taken off my shoulders, and instead given to someone who was a little better suited to doing it.”
“It was great,” commenter Willowtip writes. “We had lived together for about a year, and one Sunday afternoon we were sitting on the couch talking shit, and she started talking about how women could use boobs to get men to do literally anything. I argued that she was wrong and we weren’t that simple. She sat on my lap facing me, lifted up her shirt and said ‘will you marry me?’
“I was sworn to secrecy afterwards, but I’m pretty sure Reddit doesn’t count.”
Commenter JohnnyKeatth recites how his then-girlfriend, now-wife competitively proposed to him:
“My gf said ‘if your friend Matt and his gf get married before us that’s BS.’
“I said ‘are you proposing?’
“She wasn’t but got down on one knee anyway and did.
“She’s made me a happy man.”
As commenter Cosimo_Zaretti was proposing to his wife, she swoops in to reverse roles.
“I had the ring in my hand, I was saying how happy she made me, and how I wanted us to be together forever.
“And then she interrupted and said ‘will you marry me?’ And I said yes and put a ring on her finger.
“Then I said ‘hang on, that was my line’. And she said ‘sorry, I got excited’. Then she cried a lot.”