Periodically, the internet picks a new sexual or romantic act to meme-ify and present as peak intimacy, often through the lens of “this could be us, but you’re playing.” In years past, this phenomenon has brought us the virality of ass-eating, spitting in mouths and pegging, to name just a few. Now, we’re on the precipice of a new, hyper-intimate but semi-innocent one: holding his dick while he pees.
Just today, I scrolled past two tweets in a row about the move. “Green flags in men: 1. Letting you aim when he tinkles,” wrote @IvyKungu yesterday in a tweet that received 25,000 likes. The day before, @punishedneena shared a meme of a guy yelling at a woman wherein his words become knives that stab her. “No, you can’t hold my dick while I pee,” he says. This post was even more popular, gaining 136,000 likes so far.
If you search further, you can find dozens more instances of people expressing the same desire. Women tweet about wanting to do it, and men often tweet about wanting to find these women. There are many cases of people wanting to hold the penises of women and non-binary people who have them, too. Most often, regardless of gender, it’s not framed as an inherently sexual thing, though that’s sometimes a factor. Instead, it’s positioned as something a couple does because they’re extremely comfortable with each other and don’t want to do anything apart, not even pee.
Moreover, it’s connected to this desire many women have to play with a flaccid penis and otherwise explore their partner’s body, even in just a purely curious way. It’s a means of wielding something unfamiliar yet entirely mundane, and of experiencing a phenomenon those with penises do without thinking. Really, it just seems like an interesting activity.
“I just want to know what it feels like from a guy’s perspective to pee,” Vesper, a 22-year-old Fansly model tells me. “Or to hold it and aim it for them, or to write my name in the snow. I’ve always wanted to do that. They’re just fun to touch and hold.” Similarly, @thee_body on Twitter explains that they want to do it half because of penis envy, and half because of the extreme bonding element.
As the knife meme shows, though, there’s sometimes an imbalance between the person who wants to do the holding and the person with the penis. Much of the conversation around the act is centered around the idea of whether he’ll let you do it, and the disappointment that creeps in when he won’t. The exact reasons why aren’t often given — perhaps it makes him nervous, perhaps he’ll get hard, perhaps he just wants some privacy. My partner says he’d be worried he wouldn’t be able to pee if I did it, though I’m now more curious than ever to try.
But now that it’s increasingly becoming ingrained into the mainstream, penis-holding during peeing may become a perfectly everyday act among couples. Or maybe, it’ll even become a sort of test of their closeness. Sure you’re having sex, spending several nights a week together and planning to meet each other’s parents, but have you held his dick while he pees?
Now, hand it over.