Illustration by Ross Hillary

An Unexpected Muse

Condoms aren’t exactly glamorous. So why do so many rappers namecheck them in their songs?

Many of us have dreams of living life like rappers do. And judging from their lyrics, many rappers’ dreamy realities are peppered with emblems of public health.

https://soundcloud.com/wearemel/rapping-about-conndoms/s-DIYU3

Listen for it: Condoms. Condoms. Condoms. Prophylactic commentary in hip hop is a trope in and of itself. Here’s what some of the world’s most famous rappers have had to say about the world’s most commonly used form of birth control.

Tupac broke out the champagne glasses and the motherfucking condoms.

Jay-Z used to own condos with nothing but condoms inside of them, and Ludacris carries his condoms in a big ass sack.

Kanye uses bulletproof condoms and pretends to be getting gas while actually purchasing condoms at 7-Eleven.

Big Sean takes measures to assure his condom size will never be compromised, and Chief Keef wishes your mother had made your father wear a condom (so that you wouldn’t exist). J. Cole experienced a lot of anxiety as he practiced putting condoms on.

Future keeps both styrofoam cups and condoms handy because he’s from Atlanta, where men are known to lean and love at the same time.

Biggie was a condom filler and protected sex with Lady is so good it feels like the rubber is all faded.

Condoms: the unexpected muses to male musicians.

Tierney Finster is an editor at MEL. She previously wrote about men who fetishize women who smoke. Audio by MichaelFlocka.

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