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What Makes Me… Annoying?

According to a bartender, a male porn star, a stand-up comic and seven other experts in their field

In this installment of our “What Makes Me a…” column, we asked ten professionals what other people do that gets on their nerves. Apparently, there’s more to it than just screeching.

Brett Rossi, adult film star: What’s annoying in my particular profession is people who don’t have the best hygiene. I also find any adult performer between the ages of 18 and 22 extremely annoying due to the simple fact that they still behave as if porn is an extension of their high school years.

Carter, Nordstrom’s employee: A customer who doesn’t know what they want can be the most annoying human being on Earth. Especially when they’re already in a hurry and they’re impatient. I don’t mind helping them find a gift for their loved one, but I need something — anything — to work with.

Casey James Salengo, stand-up comic featured on Jimmy Kimmel Live!: Any audience member who talks during the show. So hecklers, of course, but also people who do what I call “positive heckling.” That’s when they’ll shout out stuff like, “That’s so funny!” It’s tough because they’re not even being mean, so you can’t go off on them because you might turn the audience against you, but it’s still completely disruptive.

Sean, personal trainer: Being in a business that’s about getting results, the biggest thing that’s annoying to me is when people pay a good amount of money to get this training, yet they follow none of the advice I give them. They don’t change their diet or exercise during the week, they just expect results from seeing me one hour a week, which of course, isn’t enough.

Steve Moran, bartender: The most annoying person at a bar is almost always the drunkest. It’s usually a guy who refuses to leave even though he’s been cut off. Luckily we have bouncers to escort them out, but oftentimes they’re not doing enough to be asked to leave, so we’ll just have to deal with having a sloppy drunk slurring his words and mumbling gibberish until he pisses off another customer. At that point, he’s gone.

James, male model: The thing I find most annoying in my profession is the way people waste other people’s time. I understand that sometimes going to a casting call means having to wait around, but it still doesn’t feel good when you wait around for four hours just to be told that you’re not “the look” they’re going for.

Kevin Soules, truck driver: I see it so many times — people who are in such a hurry that they cut you off to reach an exit, yet they were just behind you. Had they stayed behind you, what would it take, another five seconds to reach the exit? What did they gain? I see so many accidents occur for something dumb like that.

Steve, I.T. person: One thing that drives me crazy is something I like to refer to as “conditional trust,” meaning when someone will turn to me as an expert on something, yet they choose not to believe me when I tell them it isn’t broken. So they trust me to fix it, but they won’t trust me enough to tell them it’s fine. Another thing is when people withhold information that would be pertinent to the request at hand, like if someone shows up saying their laptop is broken, but they fail to say it’s because they spilled coffee on it. It’s not like I won’t figure it out once I have the laptop.

Mark, salesman: On the client side, when you get someone who doesn’t like to say “no.” They can’t bring themselves to say, “We don’t need what you’re doing,” or perhaps they just don’t understand, but they’ll never tell you they don’t understand, they just play along and waste your time. If you’re not interested, just be direct. I can handle it!

Julia, waitress: Honestly, in my line of work, it’s more apt to answer the question, what makes someone not annoying? Because these days I find everyone and everything annoying. In fact, lately I find men that are overly nice more annoying than the people who send their food back — at least there’s some honesty in their dissatisfaction. But guys, just because I’m paid to smile at you, that doesn’t mean I want to fuck you.