Stock photos are shitty. Stock photos are really, really shitty. At work I spend most of my day blindly searching through the 100 million photos on Shutterstock, asking myself, “Why am I sober? Why didn’t I go to business school? Are we going to get catered lunch today?”
But every so often the Stock Gods grace me with a gift from the deep abyss. A gift so weird that I must instantly send it to the nearest person I can find. You want a photo of a cyborg woman with a fetish for corn? Sent. Ever seen a chameleon with the head of a Labrador Retriever? Check your Slack!
Here are a few of my favorites from the weird stock photos I’ve found in the course of my normal workday.
— Sam Dworkin, assistant art editor
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1GD-9BT-efbsl1NE3ngJqCw.png)
Nude Loungin’ on a Cheeto Puff
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1liF8s_KW3raUsKNjrG_ZCQ.jpeg)
Farmer Chasing a Naked Man Off His Human Cabbage Farm
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1Nz42P-RHfes6UlTjHD_R3A.jpeg)
Centaur Meeting a Reverse Centaur on the Beach
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1w9KuubBD_u4ZUpoHBb-ApQ.jpeg)
Couple Happy About Buying a Sculpture of an Elephants Ass
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1gk3P3aP66nWLETK5RE7oNA.jpeg)
Very Hair Man Getting Massaged (He Looks Like a Penis)
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1cQ3899nBwXvEYr0zr32SjA.jpeg)
Labradorechamelon
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/15Gai5inx-uwM7b_BuPuJ3w.jpeg)
“If You Love Him, Let Him Vape”
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/155Dv8lVpwB8Ms_8TFTipag.png)
Old Woman Fishing with a Walker
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1iejRfT7UA6bKZ3IkVv9sEw.jpeg)
“In the Future Cyborg Women Love Corn”
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1Gqd2ZqNeJzc-QCq_H4a53w.jpeg)
Pumpkin Patch Suprise
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1ITAdr_QBrzLtAM68VNzoSQ.jpeg)
Mini Small Silicon Dolls
![](https://melmagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2018/08/1GAKdGImngpC5Q0vmkcyXyg.jpeg)