A Gentleman’s Guide to the Buffet

Or: How to not be a complete fucking animal when hitting up your favorite all-you-can-eat joint

Eating Myself to Death at Golden Corral

And yet, I somehow never felt full

The Hidden Limits of the ‘All-You-Can-Eat’ Buffet

Remembering how voraciously I ate as a growing pubescent boy, it almost makes my stomach hurt. After half-days in middle school, the boys and I…

‘Legs and Eggs’ and Other Strip Club Buffet Highlights

Ah yes, food and sex — the great primal preoccupations of the human race. When the two come together under one FDA-sanctioned roof, even Ron Swanson gets…