As a major anxiety sufferer and California resident, I’ve had a prescription for medical marijuana since 2006. In the decade since, I have tried — and made — all sorts of crazy cannabis products, but these days every time I go to the dispensary I see some new thing that you can eat or drink or rub on your body. As a public service, I decided to test out some of the more intriguing options to see whether they live up to the hype.
I’m getting high for you, folks, and don’t you forget it.
So what happened this week, when I forayed into the world of frozen weed treats? Did I freak out at a tiny dog? Did I spend five minutes putting nickels into a vending machine because I was in desperate need of snacks? Did I successfully convince my boyfriend to love “The Great British Bake-Off?” Let’s find out.
Product: Ganjalato salted caramel crunch marijuana-infused gelato
Ingredients: Milk, cream, sugar, dry skim milk, salted caramel, toffee (sugar, dairy butter, almonds [roasted in cocoa butter]), stabilizer (mono and diglycerides, locust bean gum, guar gum, and carageenan).
Although the ingredients list doesn’t state how the marijuana is infused, the label says that it is “made with the best quality marijuana CO2 extracts.”
Purchased from: Exhale Med Center in West Hollywood.
Suggested Dosage: Each small cup contains 100mg THC, which the label calls a “quad dose.” The label doesn’t say how many physical ounces of gelato are in each cup, and portioning it into precise quarters could be difficult.
Actual Dosage: I didn’t see the “quad dose” label until right this moment, so I just went ahead and ate the whole damn thing.
Flavor: While I love actual caramel, food trying to taste like salted caramel is usually much more of a miss than a hit for me. That being said, this wasn’t awful. The serving was small enough (probably about half a cup) that the sugar and pot flavor combo wasn’t as nauseating as it can be. Once I adjusted to the taste I realized that the quality of the actual gelato was quite good, with a silky mouth-feel, and I didn’t have any problem quickly downing the whole thing. Ganjalato also makes a cookies and cream flavor that I would definitely try the next time it’s on my shopping list.
The High: The first time I tried pot ice cream I was 18, in Costa Rica, and ordered the “special ice cream” at a bakery recommended to me by my hostel’s owner. It was the first time I discovered how it felt to wake up in the morning and still be high. There’s something special about pot ice cream (or gelato). It’s not just the dosage; it’s the way it gets into your bloodstream, takes over and lingers unexpectedly. And I gotta say that I had a blast with this iteration of gelato. It hit me so hard that it made me feel 18 again, but with the control and know-how of a 30-year-old.
Over and over again I laughed until no more noise was coming out, and even then couldn’t stop laughing. My phone was broken, and, freed for the time being from notifications and dumb addictive games, I spent the night just hanging out and enjoying the company of another person. My partner is a comedian and he always makes me laugh, but last night shit got gleefully out of control and I had a simple, simply fun time in a way I haven’t had with pot in many years.
It took me a while to fitfully fall asleep, and when I woke up I was in the dazed and woozy fog of a legit weed hangover. During the day, a hallucinogenic stoniness would sneak up on me in waves, and my body felt light and unreal. It wasn’t a horrible feeling — for sure preferable to an alcohol hangover — but it definitely got in the way of the day’s productivity.
Conclusion: Five out of six pot leaves for the Ganjalato salted caramel gelato, but only for experienced edible users. The inescapable nature of a high that lasts longer than even a mushroom trip can easily cause a loss of control and general freaking out in a person who doesn’t know how to handle themselves. Worldly old me had a grand old time, though, and I’m excited to try the cookies-and-cream flavor — but only when I don’t have to work the next day.