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That’s My Fetish: Giving Massages

An occasional series about men’s most intimate proclivities

Name: Vincent
Age: 37
From: California
Fetish: Giving massages

When did you first realize that giving massages turned you on?
It was like a proto-sexual activity for me. I was giving girls shoulder rubs before I was interested in actual sex. I was kind of a late bloomer in that regard. I had a girlfriend in eighth grade, but the light didn’t go on about sex until early in my freshman year of high school. That’s also when massage became an excuse to touch people/my go-to seduction move.

Did it work?
Back in high school at least, it was definitely a real theater-kid thing. The first time I ever saw breasts IRL was due to me trying to rub my girlfriend’s back and accidentally unfastening her bra. Her reaction was, “Oh, we’re doing this?” Then she took her shirt off.

There also was a cute Mormon girl in Drama Club who I gave a bunch of back rubs to. In hindsight, they were pretty intense. I think part of the reason why is that you’re doing stuff, but it’s not sexual except for the fact that you have your hands inside someone else’s shirt and they’re making pleasure sounds. Even if a girl doesn’t want to make out with you, if you’re good at getting kinks out of her shoulders, she’ll totally take off her bra.

What kind of massage turns you on the most?
The “platonic” massage is hot in part because you end up on the precipice of second base when rubbing someone’s shoulders. I remember one time when I was trying to make it happen with my ex in high school. She got very close to being naked, but she ultimately resisted me. There was something super hot about the frustration.

Overall, though, I think a butt massage is the hottest. There’s so much there: The top of a butt is like the lower back area; at the bottom, you have the top of the quads; and in the middle, you can throw everything around. It’s impossible to fuck up, really. Plus, if you give an intense butt massage, you’re at least tangentially touching her pussy.

Do you ever use oils or lotion? Or do you mainly just use your hands?
I don’t really know what I’m doing so I usually just use my hands. I think lotion is nice, but it really depends on her. Massage oil is kind of intense; though I’ve always wanted to do nuru massage.

What’s that?
It might primarily exist in porn, but both people get coated with this slippery substance, then the “masseuse” rubs their whole body over the other person. I imagine you need some kind of slip-proof mat. But also, like, a whole room? Wikipedia says it’s legal in Pahrump, Nevada and Canada. Good ol’ Canada!

Does that mean it’s illegal otherwise?
I’m pretty sure it’s considered sex work, since let’s be honest, you probably fuck afterward.

Have you ever paid to get a happy ending massage for yourself?
Never. I’ve actually only had two professional massages in my life. I’m definitely more giving when it comes to massages — I’m a top in this regard — but it’s also way harder for women to do it well. So I guess I like the power aspect of it, too.

Is there ever a moment of release for you?
I don’t think I’ve climaxed during a massage since at least the 10th grade.

That wasn’t necessarily the question.
I’ll usually do it until she stops me. Or if it’s a partner, until we start making out. I have, however, found that there can be a sort of massage climax on the receiving end. Not a happy ending — that’s a different thing. But there is a point where you find the spot and repeatedly focus right there.

So in general you can find satisfaction in simply giving pleasure rather than receiving it?
Yeah, I don’t really need reciprocation. I once had a long-term girlfriend who had to work way earlier than me all the time. Manualization was basically her favorite thing, and I had to argue my case that she should just let me get her off before she got ready for work and that I wouldn’t end up all bummed and blue-balled. There’s this misconception that a guy is disappointed if you don’t fuck.

Have you ever thought about becoming a masseuse?
I would totally become a masseuse, except that when it comes down to it, I wouldn’t really be in it for the right reasons.